May 14 2013: step five in mind… Confession is an ancient practice. And sharing my step four with my sponsor at the time might have been difficult when it came to the part about God. My sponsor was an atheist and well practised in legal matters. And he was also outside the fellowship. And quite a few of my friends back then were completely outside fellowship and part of recovery groups which did not have any opinion about Alcoholics Anonymous. One of my best friends at the time when I was doing my step five, had been almost two years sober and would not attend AA meetings. On one or two occasions we had got to the doors of the meeting and they would not go in with me. Just before their two-year anniversary sober, they relapsed and the shock was so great that they died the second day of their drinking. I know why they wouldn't come to AA, and why they would not submit to the real truth of where they were with life. The last conversation we had, they were so tired and so lonely, the drink was a way out for them. They were tired of life and could see no future…
I was not angry or resentful at my friend, and my sponsor and I did talk this through at a time. It was a tragedy in so many ways, and then over the years there have been many occasions when I have heard the news of another person lost to addiction and alcoholism. Often, because of self-reliance and self determination, we can struggle alone and not realise that it is the many voices who share experience, strength and hope which will keep us sober and connected to the heartbeat of fellowship, one day at a time…
Alcoholics Anonymous DonInLondon "Step Five Collection" May 14
Alcoholics Anonymous, 12 Steps AA, AA Step 5, Addiction And Recovery, DonInLondon, Don Oddy,
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