June 28 2012 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 6 Spiritual Willingness Alcoholics Anonymous Today's AA daily reflection: "determination of our founders…" It was life and death back then when the fellowship started with just a few souls. And it is still a matter of life and death today, only now when I look back do I see just how difficult it was and how easy it is to be caught up in the old ways of life…
I often talk with friends in the fellowship and we all see just how close we came to dying from our addiction to alcohol. Addiction, it is the most awful and desolate situation a person can find themselves in. And it is easy to forget as the years start to go by that we all need be grateful daily by just turning up, being a part of something bigger than us, and knowing it is okay to keep on learning to have a fruitful life even when difficult one day at a time…
I was not the best student when it came to recovery. All those years of drinking had shaped me to suppress half or more of my emotions. Anything connected to a negative or so it seemed could not be shared with anyone. I drank away the pain and the pain always came back. It is not for me to judge the pain you may have as you start your path, all I know is no matter what has happened you are a human being and can become more human just for a day…
The cofounders of the fellowship were indeed triumphant and determined. And it took every ounce of courage, learning to have faith in doing the next right thing and confidence, and even fear to an extent to find the path to sobriety. The key? Humility… The humility to say, "I simply don't know how to keep sober," and then ask for help. And help is always there if we ask and then listen to experience, strength and hope just for today…
AA Daily Reflections ~ "The determination of our founders: June 28 ~ A year and six months later these three had succeeded with seven more. [big blue book]
If it had not been for the fierce determination of our founders, A.A. would have quickly faded like so many other so-called good causes. I look at the hundreds of meetings weekly in the city where I live and I know A.A. is available twenty-four hours a day. If I had had to hang on with nothing but hope and a desire not to drink, experiencing rejection wherever I went, I would have sought the easier, softer way and returned to my previous way of life.
Ninety meetings in ninety days seemed like a tall order. It was never an order, it was a suggestion. And I wanted to belong somewhere instead of sitting in a bar, on a park bench, unable to reach out and wishing for my last breath. I went to as many meetings as I could and started to belong again…
Recovery has been a combination of listening to wisdom in the fellowship of AA, support from family, friends, community and professionals, and especially medical professionals who helped me understand the true nature of three clinical and chronic conditions…
This afternoons challenge, life is difficult, I need trust to good conscience, my own, keep learning and know I am powerless over anyone else and their conscience, accept clarity when it happens, let go and move on... knowing can be dark...
Meditation, spiritual and acceptance... to engage in mental exercise [as concentration on one's breathing or repetition of a feeling or thought] for the purpose of reaching spiritual awareness; spiritual the reality of now. Acceptance, what we can do and cannot do today...
We cannot keep anything we would take away from others... Freedom to develop our understanding of living: spiritual, emotional and physical, in fellowship we offer a path to life on life's terms. We do not control, we support and challenge, then, courage, faith and confidence may flourish…
June 28 2007
Traditions - DonInLondon ‘Day In the Life’
A good long day for me. Seems the days are longer and there is more to do and say. Not so much on my journal or indeed for the you tube videos, just more to and say each day and be involved in life. I have had a pretty ok sort of a day. The best part for me is almost always to do with meetings and being part of a world which feels less alien and hostile, and helps me find the good even in the most difficult situations.
It’s not about denial of harder moments or times, it’s because of the harder moments and times experienced, I can calibrate or make sense of the good parts of living. Even so this week has been quite difficult. Going to Wimbledon, and seeing a Doctor for an assessment, and then getting back. It’s not far, and I guess the result next depends on people I have not seen or understand their reasoning or decision making. I am in the dark, and still I feel I would like more information. I doubt in this life I will get it. Indeed another lesson in powerless over people places and things for me.
Government and Stuff in the UK
It is Farewell to Tony Blair in the UK, there seems to have been news about this for weeks, as if it matters much? I guess what matters is what is happening in the world because of his judgment and he and Mr bush have caused much calamity in my opinion. My opinion by the way, nothing to do my fellowship of AA.
The problem I cannot get to grips with, is how on earth did two governments think they could change a regime and then restore some form of democracy, when patently, the geographic, theocratic, political mechanisms were never there to make it all work easily or without great violence as a result. In this recovering persons opinion, the harm done now far outweighs what was possible had we handled the situation differently. Like aid and support, and other means to do the right thing for the Iraqi people, the people of Afghanistan and many more countries who need food education and basic living made easier and possible. Leaders talk to leaders and the like, and in the process forget the common man, who needs and wants a peaceful life, to live free and not in abject fear...
Not the AA way indeed
AA and Leadership- We have no Leaders!
My gratitude tonight. That some people driven to insanity by drink, seventy plus years ago came up with some basics to help me today, to find my path into living again. A leaderless fellowship who realised that any form of direct control what have the opposite effect on most humans most of the time. We would rebel and head back for drink and early endings.
That if we want to find true happiness and fear less anything we may encounter, we work best to choice and not to the instruction of those in powerful positions. Fear of life made us drink, fear of living a huge and horrid burden lifted in sobriety and with a few basic tools of how to live well.
In essence over the centuries it seems the learning of the generations is somehow lost, that even though the will of a few may make regimes so powerful they grow, only to falter as decadence and the power of the mighty dissipates and leads to even more conflict and downfalls.
Those who can, they get on with life, make their way, have families or in my case family and fellowship. Fellowship has helped me make sense why I don’t have a wife and family to call my own. In the living of my life, this normal state of affairs has never quite happened, I realise I was not so good a student of living I might have imagined as I look back. And partners in my life were not best pleased as I had no real clue about how to become a family man. There is no resentment in me for how things have turned out, as I see a life with friends and who knows? I don’t know much beyond today. And need not aim or try orchestrate something. We never know quite what might happen next.
Or do We?
If we are open to all the life offers we don’t need to plan or control the outcomes. Certainly as the world works a certain way, and compliance is a big part of fitting in, I am aware and feel comfortable in good company who may also be open to all life offers, as we reach different stages of living.
Overall I am always a bit circumspect when I share my Experience Strength and Hope. And still I often feel tired out and not quite so sure of what I may have said or not said. And especially with the step shares and traditions, I understand them in my head and am now learning to live a whole new way. This new way is not about knowledge of how, it’s doing the steps and changing as I do. Experience is my key.
The conundrum of whether one shares a story well or quite honestly in my opinion, I learn more when I have big gaps in my sharing. And when I forget a part of what is important in step and tradition meetings, I am hugely grateful there are more people in the room who know and have experienced more than me. And they inform me as much as anything I may say..
Tonight in Good Company
A real spectrum of humanity, with every element of what life is like in recovery. Conflicts and more, just stuff we air, and the reality is we are all sober for these few hours a day. And the more we stay sober, the more experience for us to understand, and laugh at where we are now. Forever learners in this small big life we get back. All just for a day!
One good friend is back, another trying, and another not there tonight is hopefully somewhere in another meeting. And in the day I hear as people share their stories, it’s good to hear plain and happy as well as sad accounts of life happening.
And in this fellowship we probably face things a little more directly without the aid of some filters we used to destruction and drove ourselves mad. Today we apply learning and wisdom, get to be right sized, and equal to living.
When we lose the plot we share it, when we make life work, we share it, and we learn most from each other in this daily round of life.
Years Ago to Now
The wisdom I learn daily is as easily forgotten as we share and try learn life again. I have let go much of what made me hurt more. The falseness of much we encounter daily is full of humbuggery and ego. As we find in our confidence, the world is far better for us as we find a path where we meet likeminded people, just aiming for a good day of sorts.
Old wisdoms and a path to acceptance of life on life’s terms does not stop our success in the world, it just makes it all worth it and lived and experienced, a day at a time. Good or bad life lived in the moment is the spiritual connection to now. My zeitgeist compliments of AA...
Step 6 "Spiritual Willingness" Reading Video Link:
wrongs. Chapter 6, Into Action, Big Book From: Page 72 Thru: Page 75, the bottom of the page. 12 And 12 Step 5."
June ~ Video Reading Chapter Six Into Action Link:
I do not speak for Alcoholics Anonymous I speak for myself. Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of unique and authentic people who speak for themselves where they will to share experience, strength and hope about recovery on a daily basis. Anonymity affords sanctuary to find how to live sober and be open, honest and willing to learn life day by day. For me "truth," "love" and "wisdom" offer the best spiritual experience by living reality today. Into the fabric of recovery from alcoholism are woven the Twelve Steps and the Traditions: steps to be open, honest and willing to learn, traditions to live unity, service and recovery.
Spiritual principles ~ Forgiveness Acceptance Surrender Faith Open-mindedness Honesty Willingness Moral-inventory Amends Humility Persistence Spiritual-growth Service