Saturday, 5 May 2012

May 5 2012 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 5 Admit And Accept | Alcoholics Anonymous

May 5 2012 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 5 Admit And Accept | Alcoholics Anonymous Today's AA daily reflection: "forest for the trees…" Or another words I can't see the big picture because I'm stuck somewhere in it, I'm in the problem and need help to get to the solution…

I remember my father bought a small multipurpose garden machine, on first use with the plough, he ran as fast as he could with a cigarette dangling from his lips until he hit something and the plough dug in. He wouldn't let it go and he ended up in a big hole. He was good at holding on through gritted teeth! He taught me how to hold on as well, self-will and self-determination became obsession all too often. Letting go was the answer and asking for help was the key…

And today, in recovery it is all too easy to dig in and keep digging when a light touch, sharing with another human being can be an answer where we stop digging, look at the big picture and take a helicopter view. When the truth prevails, we may have to keep digging, or stop digging and find something new to do. Asking the help, prayer and meditation and if God works through people, there are a multitude of solutions one day at a time…

Letting go and asking for help can be very difficult if we have found ourselves in a place of true grit and self will. Which is why the spot check inventory helps clear my mind of false expectations. And step one, powerlessness and unmanageability around people places and things, step two, the insanity of digging into the same old problems over and over is balanced out by step three, let go and ask for help…

"Let go and let God" is something I hear quite often, and "handing it over…" I do feel it is difficult to understand where the boundaries are between the amount of determination and effort I can put in and where I might let go. As God works through people, timely advice and support from the right people in the right place can change everything. And the serenity prayer is the best guide every single moment, to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference… The serenity prayer always helps to stop me running into brick walls, and getting back on the highway of life with more freedom of choice just for today...

DonInLondon 2005-2011

"I can't see the forest for the trees!" Back then, in the problem, there was a herd of elephants in the room.. In the solution I see the mice that may trip me up so I hit my head on the stump of stubbornness, ego and intolerance of myself and others. To love, cherish and be forgiving always, we keep learning and changing and others may too..

"Spin Doctors" deny and hide the problem; "Medicine Men" offer the "quick fix." The solution is to cover basic needs and deal with our wants as they resurface when life improves and always live life one day at a time..

Listening to BBC Breakfast this morning, it was very pleasing to hear economists are talking about everyone having to deal with denial, anger and acceptance over the hardships we all face over the next few years

We do not need spin doctors or medicine men, we need men and women who can lead and of good character, open, honest and willing to be truthful. Who are they today?

May 5 2007

Listen Without Prejudice - DonInLondon ‘Day In the Life’

Seems like a reasonable thing to do, to listen without being too opinionated. The truth is tho we have a whole load of experience and expectations about people places and things, and we expect them a certain way, our way.

Our way

Is our way always the best? Of course for anyone going through the steps process in AA, the 12 step programme, it does make us think and feel differently about a lot of our living and our experiences.

Our Way

Some of our way has helped us keep body and soul together, and then something of us had been lost in a dependency, addiction and loss of power over anything. We became powerless over alcohol and life was unmanageable the way we were, doing our thing, our way.

What we learn in the first and most important acknowledgement of our living is powerlessness over alcohol. This bruising and horrible truth renders us pretty raw and circumspect.

The gift however, the gift of the truth, that we are powerless over most things in this world can be a real happy release. Providing of course we do accept what it means.


We will never stop judging ourselves and others, its just the way we are built, yet we do need to take account that we are truly not running the whole of creation, or even or particular bit of it as we may suggest. The truth is people have their own lives and living to sort, and we may influence as they influence us, but the choices remain ours and theirs to make.

When we are new into our fellowship we tend to listen reasonably well, and as we get a bit more sober often we find there is a whole lot of misunderstanding about how we are to live in this brave new world without drink and to a certain extent without prejudice.


To what extent can we become perfect is a good question. Of course the answer is simple, we cannot become perfect and never will. Why? Because the goal posts, the target if you like is always changing.

We are in a programme of change, which means its fluid, it never holds together without some elasticity. The best we can do is aim to make progress and not ever be perfect. Nothing is ever completely pinned down. Nothing is immutable.

The problem is as I can see just for now, that we like to be right, even when we might be wrong, or indeed very wrong.

Self Will

Yes self-will and prejudice, preferences and actually doing things our way will forever cause some blurring of our good intent and bad outcomes.

Self-will, to wait and do what we may when we are this far along in recovery leads to permissions, like for example, going out to dangerous places, having opinions and behaviour which can still drive others bonkers and lead to torment and anguish.

Even when we feel we have rights to live a certain way, other equally dominant characters can try make us desist and want their own way. And in many instances they are family and close friends who warn us and make prejudice of our behaviour their focus.

Most likely there is some middle ground where the blurs from every quarter make a dogs breakfast in our own empire and sphere of influence. Trying to do the right things can be as helpful as imposing impossible scenarios on others around what we do. Doing nothing can be the best option when we are broken and in need of some emotional repairs.

Holding on to what helps us, can actually been seen as unhelpful and horrible for others who have contradictory opinions.


We need time often and we are so impatient to be right again and well with world. I chatted and had great conversations about these issues and other things too over the last few days.

Time for me

I have needed all the time taken so far, to get a clearer picture of what the last few years have meant for me. And in essence time keeps changing my targets and what I can do.

The Problem

If only! If only things would just stand still long enough I might make a greater impression and get well faster and then speed up and be the person I used to be. But then I realise its not going to be that way. The shift in circumstances means there are things I know more about, and other things have been or become less possible and counterproductive.

Lost in Space

Somewhere in the Universe I fit exactly where I am now. Where in this vast panoply of Universal and elemental struggles I am is as I find.

Reality is now, what others say is true, as much as what I may say is true. Truth and honesty are always fluid, yet we believe we have the truth even when we build our truth on limited and prejudiced outlooks.

So we need Forgive

Seems to be a theme this week to have forgiveness close at hand at all times in all situations. Especially as everyone we meet won’t ever reciprocate our feelings of forgiveness, or they may, but in my experience its only after much time has passed that anything might change in others.

Get real

Yes let us be real, accept we do have prejudice, to our preferences, and this will often lead to conflicts inside us and around us.

I realise the reality is to move with grace and care, not hurting if we can be so inclined, and realising some of our decisions when we look back will seem so distorted, we will forgive our self-will and egocentric selves. Even when others are stuck and not forgiving a thing… we may forgive them their outlook based on our straightness and decisions based on the here now and now, then changing through time.

We do come Round

Yes we do come round and see the big picture, and see our part in life, and as we develop we will be amazed at our changes and better living. Not perfect, just good enough for now and until the next crisis or calm occurs.

We are intrinsic and extrinsic in so many ways, we forget others in ourselves. And especially if we have helped make people or family or friends the way they see and look out at everything, then we can be assured whatever we so, then we reap straight back. Strong will and ego, begets as many as we encounter and influence. Or others may leave us out and exclude us.


The harshest and most formidable weapon mankind has. Best left unused like nuclear bombs, for they devastate down the generations and we need heed our intent and use of such devastating tools.

Inclusion and truth

Well we can do our best and know the consequences are what we make them. This is sometimes the most difficult of choices. And as rewarding sometimes as they may be damaging. There are no rules as we know these elements will change, except for one. We live the consequences as they manifest. And that is reality as we experience.

In the end its neither right or wrong which matters, its how we love and are loved. Its how we include and exclude. It’s how we control or give up control which will define our living overall.

Gentle, forgive and forgive again as we learn the lessons over and over, progressing as we may. Perfect? Is the ever present, present moment of now as live our spiritual consequences forever changing as we all travel in the same space and time? So diverse we are every connection and perception different and from similar experiences. It’s no wonder we find life such an endeavour and never complete. If it were so there would be no purpose at all.

AA Daily Reflection: THE FOREST AND THE TREES... What comes to us alone may be garbled by our own rationalization and wishful thinking. The benefit of talking to another person is that we can get his direct comment and counsel on our situation. . . . . TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 60
I cannot count the times when I have been angry and frustrated and said to myself, “I can’t see the forest for the trees!” I finally realized that what I needed when I was in such pain was someone who could guide me in separating the forest and the trees; who could suggest a better path to follow; who could assist me in putting out fires; and help me avoid the rocks and pitfalls. I ask God, when I’m in the forest, to give me the courage to call upon a member of A.A.
AA Official Site Daily Reflections ~ AA Official Big Book And Twelve And Twelve Online
"Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. Chapter 6, Into Action, Big Book From: Page 72 Thru: Page 75, the bottom of the page. 12 And 12 Step 5."
May ~ All About Step Five:"Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs"
Step 5 "Admit And Accept" Reading Video Link:

May ~ Video Reading Chapter Six Into Action Link:

I do not speak for Alcoholics Anonymous I speak for myself. Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of unique and authentic people who speak for themselves where they will to share experience, strength and hope about recovery on a daily basis. Anonymity affords sanctuary to find how to live sober and be open, honest and willing to learn life day by day. For me "truth," "love" and "wisdom" offer the best spiritual experience by living reality today. Into the fabric of recovery from alcoholism are woven the Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions, steps to be open, honest and willing to learn, traditions to live unity, service and recovery.
Spiritual principles ~ Forgiveness Acceptance Surrender Faith Open-mindedness Honesty Willingness Moral-inventory Amends Humility Persistence Spiritual-growth Service

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