May 17 2012 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 5 Admit And Accept | Alcoholics Anonymous Today's AA daily reflection: "and forgive and I have had to forgive over and over again…" Especially when Santander tries rip me off for my home insurance demanding over 100% over the odds on the quote and then trying to defend the indefensible… "Forgive the cuntibollockbastards… Just for today"
In these times of austerity, the efficient thing to do when sent erroneous quotes by bankers and insurers is to compare the rates available. Take no notice of what they call "new business rates" because you can get a new business rate from somebody else for half the price. I need to give them a wide berth, calm down and forgive myself for being angry and upset when they quote lies, I know how insurance is calculated from my previous work experience…
And having written these words about forgiveness, I realise every single emotion in me is working, from anger and resentment, to love joy and happiness, all these emotions are working in me right now. I love my family and my friends and I cherish them. I cherish also the other emotions I pushed away for so many years which some perceive as negative. Without the negative emotions as they are sometimes judged I would not understand all the positive emotions I feel today…
When I feel righteous indignation, I do utilise the can do and cannot do in the serenity prayer. I can feel anger and resentment and indignation, and think some scenarios would suit me greatly, and know they would damage me as a very human and sensitive being if I were to keep thinking badly because then my actions might be bad and hurtful to myself. I don't want to hurt anybody and I don't want to hurt me either, easy does it, and forgive for the rest of the day…
Acceptance... Emotional, spiritual and physical "beings," just for today. To be or not to be, in the moment of now... A daily meditation to accepting the world, people, places and things are as they may be. Living reality with our courage to change, we learn the "wisdom of the possible"
When the best we can do, has felt like the worst for others. We will have those days, where anger and resentment catch hold and gnaw deep... We learn what to do and learn to forgive ourselves. As we meet others doing their best on their worst day, can we forgive them?
"The A.A. Steps & Traditions are neither rules, regulations, nor laws." A.A. COMES OF AGE, P. 105... I wonder if this is generally understood by many in our fellowship. And what happens when this is misunderstood?
AA Daily Reflections ~ "... AND FORGIVE Under very trying conditions I have had, again and again, to forgive others-also myself. AS BILL SEE IT p. 268
Forgiveness of self and forgiveness of others are just two currents in the same river, both hindered and shut off completely by the dam of resentment. Once that dam is lifted, both currents can flow. The Steps of A.A. allow me to see how resentment has built up and subsequently blocked off this flow in my life. The Steps provide a way by which my resentments may - by the grace of God as I understand Him -be lifted. It is as a result of this solution that I can find the necessary grace which enables me to forgive myself and others."
May 17 2007
Art of Living - DonInLondon ‘Day In the Life’
It’s good to be in a fellowship meeting. I get to listen and then share when the mood takes me. Some people don’t really understand life and what it’s all about. And somewhere along the way of living, I too had a crisis and a place where life was unbearable. Why? I lost the plot completely.
I will write more on the Art of Living another night. But a question has been asked and I feel the need to share an answer. My answer is simply of the top of my head and is a gentle response and respectful.
“Don, I enjoy watching your blogs. The web page above is for the AA.org site and their publication on anonymity. In this publication they modify the 11th tradition to include "all new media". I have been posting to the Anti-AA site as a recovering member of AA. Do you think it wise? Should recovering members be arguing the AA cause at this level? Cheers”
Thanks for your words. I do understand what you are saying. And I am cautious about what Anonymity is about. Anonymity does serve on the two levels suggested. And I guess if there were any hierarchy in AA it would be enforced in some way. If AA had the status of organization I might not be in AA. And if AA were to challenge me in some way about my conduct, well who can? My group? Or AA central? There is no central governing body of AA and anything AA “Headquarters” might put into print is on behalf of the Fellowship groups and fellowship members. There is no power in AA at any level above the AA group Conscience I have been led to believe.
The question of anonymity to protect some from the stigma of a disease is understandable. The concept of principles before personalities is also a good idea too. The key is in the paragraph:
“In stressing the equality of all A.A. members - and unity in the common bond of their recovery from alcoholism - anonymity serves as the spiritual foundation of the Fellowship. Back in 1946, Bill W., our co-founder, wrote: “The word ‘anonymous’ has for us an immense spiritual significance. Subtly but powerfully, it reminds us that we are always to place principles before personalities; that we have renounced personal glorification in public; that our movement not only preaches but actually practices a true humility.”
I do not speak for AA on any matters at all, I speak for me and my recovery and my Journal is all about me and world events. It is illustrative and about my experiences and strength and hope. And merely share as do millions a blog about life and living. I share stories of life as it relates to me and my progress. And truthfully it makes no difference to me if people read it or view it. It’s a personal biography.
I am not a spokesman for Alcoholics Anonymous
I do share AA does me good and does not harm me in any way. The absolute truth for me is everyone has their path that is the traditions are there to keep us safe and sound. We are all equal in the fellowship and decide at group conscience level how groups of AA are run. As to a general service board or council having the right to interfere in an individual’s recovery, and how they go about it, is a good question. And actually they cannot dictate a person’s recovery, or they break the principles of the fellowship. The AA group is autonomous and the decision making at group level is then shared by the General Service Council. The Service counsel with respect to what they do, are simply the administrators of the fellowship, they are not in charge of it and they work on behalf of the fellowship. It is their service commitment. They are not leaders or spokespeople either, we don’t have any? Or do we? Maybe I am a bit simple, but why make it complicated?
I am happy there is no spokesperson and we don’t affiliate with anything. It would be unhelpful I feel.
There is only one tradition which need be applied to our affiliation to AA that is anyone wishing to find a path in sobriety can be in the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous. Spiritually there is no mileage in trying to utilize AA as a platform for personal gain. I would fail at living if I utilized what saved me from self-destruction as a means to personal gains over other fellows in AA. I have no desire either to inflate my ego or anyone else’s ego in intent. In practice we are all judged by what we do and how we behave. We cannot escape others judgments or prejudice if they feel they have some grievance or judgment to put to us.
I prefer to live utilizing faith courage, and confidence, self-esteem if you like and share my message. I don’t enjoy reverting to fear, then bravery, because of fear and Ego because I am fearful and ego, can lead me to a completely horrible existence. But I do realize some may find it hard to know the difference if indeed they are able to differentiate. I am always mindful though’ that the road to hell is paved with good intent. And I may be deluded about what is good for me.
As a fellowship we can describe our fellowship and how it works. Anonymity in this context serves the fellowship well. However as to personal anonymity, and personal conduct, we need to be careful and respectful of traditions and personal journey's in recovery. I need to be respectful of these traditions which keep me safe and right sized.
And ultimately it’s for me to judge my path with my mentor, and not interfere with anyone else’s recovery. The simple explanation of the twelve traditions and twelve steps of AA as published make me able to make my life work again. I don’t feel the need to alter one word of them. And I don’t know I have the energy to devote to challenge or being challenged on my spiritual path. No one can judge me and I cannot judge anyone in truth and in the fellowship. I may only judge what is good for me in good conscience with my guide, and most likely group conscience.
But if there is a “Bleeding Deacon” lurking (unfortunately they exist in and outside the fellowship by the way), they can challenge me as they will. I am better to mind my own business usually and seek guidance locally.
We work best flexibly and with the spirit of fellowship, as each finds their way in this very diverse global society. I have no desire to interfere with anyone else’s and their path, and remain respectful to traditions and steps in the twelve by twelve. As they are magnificent suggestions to me, they may be completely unhelpful to others. Live and let live. Keep safe and on a path which helps us to live our life in this very hard modern world.
Truthfully the more I understand my journey the more enthusiastic I am about the real traditions and real steps of recovery as written and suggested. I suggest we might update the language and understanding of the twelve steps and twelve traditions, so they reflect the true diversity and body of fellows in this big wide world. But you know what? They seem to work pretty well as they are and I have a life to lead as do others.
I am still a Novice
How my views change will reflect how I live and endeavor. The spiritual path is as clear as it may be, one day at a time. And there are far more people out there with more wisdom I may ever know in this life. And just for today I am sober, feel more enlightened and more able to get on with living.
I am just me, a single voice in the big world. And have no ambition to change anything but me and my attitudes as they are developed in a sober frame of mind and with a fellowship which keeps me safe.
Sharing experience strength and hope is a personal outlook and journey. How we do this? Well we all change over time. And I guess I will too. As life unfolds...
We are equal after all, when all is said and done…
"Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. Chapter 6, Into Action, Big Book From: Page 72 Thru: Page 75, the bottom of the page. 12 And 12 Step 5."
May ~ All About Step Five:" Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs"
Step 5 "Admit And Accept" Reading Video Link:
May Video Reading Chapter Six Into Action Link:
I do not speak for Alcoholics Anonymous I speak for myself. Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of unique and authentic people who speak for themselves where they will to share experience, strength and hope about recovery on a daily basis. Anonymity affords
sanctuary to find how to live sober and be open, honest and willing to learn life day by day. For me "truth," "love" and "wisdom" offer the best spiritual experience by living reality today. Into the fabric of recovery from alcoholism are woven the Twelve Steps and the
Twelve Traditions, steps to be open, honest and willing to learn, traditions to live unity, service and recovery.
Spiritual principles ~ Forgiveness Acceptance Surrender Faith Open-mindedness Honesty Willingness Moral-inventory Amends Humility Persistence Spiritual-growth Service