Alcoholics Anonymous Blog & Video | July 5 2014
Do I need help to be sober today? Do I want to be sober today? Needs met, wants forgotten. So the answers for me, I do need help on a daily basis. On my emotional and spiritual journey, sober comes first. And this is an inside job as I hear often in the Fellowship. Every single time I go to a meeting, I realise I need to be there, to hear the experience, strength and hope of fellows in Fellowship. And wanting to be sober? Yes I wanted to be sober, but I did not want to have to work at doing it when I first arrived, I thought I could think my way out of my problem. And my thinking had always made it worse, and pride, ego and fear kept me isolated, thinking I could do it all on my own. Like always…
The thinking trap. Taught from an early age that I needed to stand on my own two feet, put on a brave face and show no fear, and don't tell anyone about anything which felt shameful. Being vulnerable was not the key, being strong and invincible and prepared to be the last man standing, and that was very difficult to maintain. It took a long time to realise that if I were able to demonstrate and be vulnerable when things were unknown, vulnerability is either acknowledged by everybody, or the thinking trap embraces and vulnerability is seen as a weakness rather than an imperative strength.
Nothing stops progress faster than strong beliefs in old ways, strong beliefs in "my way or the highway." Beliefs can be very important, to keep people strong when everything is falling apart. At the same time holding on to old beliefs, which impede emotional and spiritual progress will keep many in everlasting ignorance about how to be free and have freedom again in whatever direction we choose, and you choose for yourself. Courage, faith and confidence is about developing your own choices and learning what is good for you, and not what is good for me, because I have my own path and you have yours. It's all about who you are, and learning a little bit more about who you are on a daily basis.
Compromise: the art of negotiation and achieving a common goal. Fellowship is all about acknowledging the similarities we have and not the differences. Very often in the process of learning about people, Fellowship provides the best self-appraisal system I have found in all my experience of living. Unfortunately, when the self-appraisal system "the twelve steps and twelve traditions," is applied to others, it can make a fellow very judgemental, very prejudiced and very unforgiving. The principles, "the twelve steps and twelve traditions," are only applicable to ourselves, if we are to make emotional and spiritual progress on a daily basis. Applied in any other way, although the exercise may happen very often, it offers more of a path of destruction, rather than reconstruction as was intended.
And progress not perfection, means we have to give ourselves a break for where we have got to, where we are today and what we may be building for the future. Living in the day, where feelings experienced fit with reality seems like an impossible possibility. As with all things, responding is good and so is reaction when speed is of the essence. Always a tightrope, and balance is another imperative, sometimes happening in the moment of now.
Being included in life, being loved, and understanding how to love others. Depending on our characteristics, our personalities, and expression and need for inclusion and love is something we learn as we live life. Better not be labelled one way or another, simply develop your own outlook and find inclusion where you need to, and learning about love is about being vulnerable and open honest and willing to find out what works for you. It's not about being like other people, it is learning to be yourself wherever you happen to be.
Step Seven Video 12 And 12
Alcoholics Anonymous Videos, AA is for Alcoholics, AA 12 Steps, Addiction And Recovery, DonInLondon, Don Oddy,
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