Alcoholics Anonymous | March 31 2013 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power"

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 31 2013 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" "we are going to know a new freedom…" If I am not the higher power, where does my freedom come from? The new freedom for me: freedom from extremes of fear, pride and ego. Letting go of fear, pride and ego opens the door… To ask for help when I don't know the answer, courage to change, faith in doing the next right thing and growing confidence that I can live with greater freedom of choice, one day at a time…

Video For Today:

Alcoholics Anonymous DonInLondon "Freedom To Be You"

Freedom from: "the slavery of addiction," "an old repetitive life" "having to be right, and look right" "old behaviour which was a liability," "hiding who I am from other people because the new person is much improved," "old feelings of inadequacy." New freedom: "to start life over," "to identify and be willing to make amends," "make amends without doing further harm and without reservation," "to take time out to improve, and to have gratitude," "to reflect and meditate and ask for help when needed, and seek clarity," "to let go the old way of life, continue to develop a new life, and share how when asked, and keep on learning better principles of living," one day at a time. Steps in action, progress not perfect, and we can always start again. Whatever happens!

 

Easter Sunday starts with a bright blue sky and yet the news in the UK is all about lies, damned lies and statistics from the government. According to four of the main churches, the economic difficulties in the UK are not caused by the poor. And these religious organisations as well as secular organisations suggest "the UK media," is spreading lies which the government is responsible for. Although it sits well with the government to criticise the poor for being a drain on the well-being of those in work, the poorest in work are those who really need the support that the government wishes to take away, as well as the unfortunates who cannot get a job and are excluded from employment. I mention this in passing because I feel the anger and misrepresentations of large numbers of the UK population is making our society more polarised and conflicted. Ruining the reputation of poor people is no way to improve the economic situation. Making people self-prejudiced and stigmatised causes horror and grief, and ultimately rebellion. The reason I say this is because the more people are stigmatised, the more they identify with their stigma and the prejudice against them. As ugly can be, especially on this particular religious festival for many millions around the world…

 

What makes the difference in recovery? I don't know the answer for you. And it would be a presumption if I did. And the reason why I am still alive is because people came together in fellowship and found a solution to how to restart life. The twelve steps work if we can work at them and all we need is the right encouragement. We don't need to be pushed into anything, we cannot be pushed into sobriety, all it takes is awareness and hopefully a desire to be sober for a day. The more I was told what to do with my life, the more I rebelled against it, partly in the beginning because I had no real clue what was going on. And then as life went on, I rebelled because life just seemed like an unending journey of misery, without the basic ingredient that every human needs, and that need is love…

 

Experience, strength and hope… To be redeemed and share how to restart life, even though we had become derelict, that by finding fellowship, with unity and recovery at the core and helping each other without conditions is a profound awakening. And especially today, although I am not a religious person, the spiritual awakening any human can have, is to be able to cope and live the reality of now. And when we cannot cope, we can ask for help. The experience, strength and hope of the many helping one person find their way back from hell. To be able to find useful endeavours which suit each of us and then we find happiness in new endeavours is in my opinion miraculous. And we can keep on changing to the good, keep on finding where the bad and ugly bits are, and hopefully let go, repeating the bad and ugly bits too often. Freedom to choose, freedom to strive for what is important to you and not to be enslaved or a martyr to other people's causes and conflicts today…

 

I feel very grateful to be alive and to be able to see the possibilities in life, and to have choices. Even when life is difficult, we can develop the freedom to find a new path. To other people our endeavour may not seem glamorous and that does not matter, what matters is the quality of our emotional and spiritual living. Living and experiencing our feelings in the moment of now, which informs us about what is right and wrong for each of us in the moment, and when we find ourselves going in the wrong direction, we can take action to change. All we need is courage to change, faith in doing the next right thing and confidence to be the person we are and happy to be so just for today… And when we cannot be the person we wish to be, we can make plans, not to trip ourselves up, simply, to make plans towards more freedom of choice and be active in making those choices and not stuck in the old life again…

 

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 31 2012 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" Alcoholics Anonymous Today's AA daily reflection: "no one denied me love…" Rock bottom, a place where nothing takes away the pain of day-to-day living. I'm thankful that tradition three, "a desire to stop drinking" opened the door to a new way of living no matter what else ailed me…

Video For Today:

2009 - 2012

On occasion in Fellowship groups, a person will speak out and say this Fellowship is only for the type of alcoholics described in the big book. First feelings when I hear it, "horror and dismay that the person has so much prejudice, self-prejudice and then a prejudice against "improper or less severe cases who have less of a problem, or more severe cases who have multi-addictions to substance and behaviour." And step one, makes it plain as do all the steps, that's none of my business…

In the AA daily reflections, the month of March is all about step three, letting go and letting good things come into our lives. Letting go the old attitudes and behaviour which kept us drinking, letting go being right about everything, letting go being wrong about everything. With the principles of open, honest and willing to change we find we can let go of something harmful today, and start something fresh which helps us develop a more healthy attitude and outlook in the moment of now…

Unconditional love… How to love without conditions, how to be loved back just as people can give their life experience and ability to develop their feelings. If a person has never learned how to love unconditionally, they cannot. I did not understand unconditional love until I began to experience it. And even now it can be so overwhelming I can break down. As a newcomer this happened to me and hurt a lot. It was part of the grieving process of letting go an old redundant life…

And although I wish it wasn't so, "pain is often a part of our spiritual progress" where our feelings are right sized for the experience we are having today. Contingent on being aware of what spiritual progress is, "the good, the bad and the ugly of life" in other words everything, having let go and made room for new living I may make some progress just for today…

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DonInLondon 2005-2011

Today I understand how the higher power works in my life. And have gratitude for everyone who has a higher power in their lives as they understand. Some call their higher power God, and some simply, the higher power. I cannot define God or Nature and Providence. I have learned that "truth," "love" and "wisdom" informs me what I can and cannot do today...

Rather than self-reliance on my own point of view, my own outlook and my own self-interest or personal opinion, asking for help to learn and understand what universal "truth," "love" and "wisdom" is on a daily basis. I have perspective, freedom of choice based on reality, life on life's terms, interdependent and equal, included in the possible. What more do I need today?

Inclusion, choice and fellowship, we learn how to be sober, recognise how to deal with life, know it can be at extremes sometimes, then return to a more balance outlook as we deal with life in the moment. As we learn the truth, develop friendships and loving relationships and gain wisdom from experience and others, life works. Always just for today…

Can we let go? When we and those we love, do the best possible, when best feels worst. We strive to do our best, yet it can feel like the worst cut of all to another .. How do we forgive, let go, and accept what is possible? Cherish reality and people we love ..

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AA Daily Reflection: NO ONE DENIED ME LOVE On the A.A. calendar it was Year Two . . . . A newcomer appeared at one of these groups . . . . He soon proved that his was a desperate case, and that above all he wanted to get well. . . . [He said], “Since I am the victim of another addiction even worse stigmatized than alcoholism, you may not want me among you.” TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 141-42

I came to you - a wife, mother, woman who had walked out on her husband, children, family. I was a drunk, a pill-head, a nothing. Yet no one denied me love, caring, a sense of belonging. Today, by God’s grace and the love of a good sponsor and a home group, I can say that -through you in Alcoholics Anonymous - I am a wife, a mother, a grandmother and a woman. Sober. Free of pills. Responsible. Without a Higher Power I found in the Fellowship, my life would be meaningless. I am full of gratitude to be a member of good standing in Alcoholics Anonymous.

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As Bill Sees It ~ Foundation for Life... We discover that we receive guidance for our lives to just about the extent that we stop making demands upon God to give it to us on order and on our terms. In praying, we ask simply that throughout the day God place in us the best understanding of His will that we can have for the day, and that we be given the grace by which we may carry it out. There is a direct linkage among self-examination, meditation, and prayer. Taken separately, these practices can bring much relief and benefit. But when they are logically related and interwoven, the result is an unshakable foundation for life. TWELVE AND TWELVE

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Alcoholics Anonymous, 12 Steps AA, Addiction And Recovery, DonInLondon, Don Oddy,

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Just For Today, and every day cherish always...

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AA Official Online Site: Daily Reflections

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/aareflections.cfm

AA Official Online Site: Big Book And Twelve And Twelve

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=359

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 30 2013 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power"

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 30 2013 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" "contingent on the day I ask and remind myself, twelve steps to improve my emotional and spiritual experience…" And in fellowship: "twelve traditions, which hold us in unity, service and recovery…" What about me!? One voice in recovery one day at a time is not enough. We all share together, experience strength and hope. And we hear our own story in the words shared by many sober people and we can have hope, and learn life as it can be today…

Video For Today:

Alcoholics Anonymous DonInLondon "Humility To Ask For Help"

I was listening to a documentary about survivors of cancer. Once they have the "all clear" they are discharged and given a set of recommendations. And the overwhelming news from the survivors: "people don't understand what we've been through, they don't realise that being cured, or at least in remission, life was changed forever. And we don't know how to live it." But like all professionals in any field which saves lives, resources are limited and discharge does not mean that people are equipped to deal with life after the life-saving intervention. I have enormous gratitude that two people sat together and worked out that survivors with like experiences might be able to develop a way to learn how to live life and keep safe in recovery one day at a time…

 

Even if we have been physically cured of something, the emotional impact is profound. All types of feelings come out after a life changing event, extreme feelings which no one really knows what to do with on a personal basis, because no one can be taught. We can know the theory, but until we are in the experience of post-traumatic shocks, seeing it from the outside, is never the same as seeing it from the inside. Even when we know the theory, practice will always be difficult at the extremes of life events. It is remarkable that there is any type of fellowship, like Alcoholics Anonymous because the survival rates into recovery have always been low and still remain so, because it is uncharted territory for the majority of humans living today…

 

I am powerless over alcohol and if I take a drink life will get unmanageable. I do believe that a power greater than me helps me be restored to sanity on a daily basis. Made a decision to let go and ask for help, to keep on learning the truth, love and wisdom of now, which changes all the time. Remember my self-appraisal of assets and liabilities to help me be aware (shortcomings and defects), which can be triggered on any given day. Accept the truth of who I am and willing to share it. Be aware that my liabilities of fear, pride and ego, can well up again if I am agitated. Be aware that my assets, courage to change, faith in doing the next right thing and confidence can develop by asking for help. Having made a list of amends and willing to make them and add to the list those I have forgotten. Continue to make amends, appropriately and when possible. I can stop in any moment and look at my feelings and behaviour to improve outcomes today. Pausing for reflection, meditation and prayer will improve my conscious intentions to live to the truth, love and wisdom of now. My spiritual awakening is continuous contingent on my personal awareness of my intentions and especially my actions. My actions are what people see, and sharing a message, freely given, and freely received is all part of life, one day at a time…

 

A desire to stop drinking: that is the only requirement suggested to be a part of the fellowship of AA, Alcoholics Anonymous. And as I often say, and my videos and in my writing, when I first got to AA, it was not under my own steam, it was a distraught family member who pushed me through the doors of a meeting many years ago. And even when I thought it was probably a good idea to go to seek professional help for my problem with drink and admit I'm an alcoholic, I still needed the approval of my family before I went. Over the years, family did not want me to be an alcoholic, and I did not want to be an alcoholic. It was entirely disagreeable to think that if they I drank like I did, was I the only one in the family? An alcoholic? Everyone is always aware that there is a level of drinking, which is seen as acceptable. And a rite of passage… I just found out the other day, that a distant family connection, a whole branch of my family, took the pledge many decades ago, because there was something wrong with the way they drank… Useful to know as a piece of history, it would have had no impact on me and my rite of passage and subsequent and headlong jump into ignorance and alcoholism…

 

How am I feeling today? I feel okay just now, and quite serene. It is early though, and the world is quiet in some parts, and in other parts at war with itself. The madness of being at war with oneself is something any alcoholic in recovery knows and so does the active alcoholic. The addiction is so strong and our emotional situation so bleak, that although we know the answer is to stop being at war with ourselves, we cannot stop fighting, and we cannot risk surrender without losing everything that we thought we were. Breaking habits of a lifetime, on the emotional level, the ones which suggest that we are powerful over everything can keep us in everlasting ignorance of the answer. Today it's not about power for me, and it's not about proving myself in some way to you. It is about knowing my emotional and spiritual condition, my ability to cope with what is going on today. I can make progress in the company of fellowship, family and community. By asking for help and sharing experience, strength and hope all day long. And finding out more about how to love, how to be loved back and find useful things which I enjoy and give me happiness, peace and serenity today. Of course in any given day there will be good, bad and ugly because that is life, and once we accept that life is full of good, bad and ugly bits, each bit is not a problem unless we make it so, over and over again. Life is the journey, and the destination the same for everyone…

 

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 30 2012 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" Today's AA daily reflection: "group conscience…" The group conscience, one of the mainstays in our anarchic democracy. Recovery is about reality, developing our emotional range which fits with reality. Life is full of passion and compassion, as we start to feel life in the moment, emotions and actions can be balanced or at the extremes. The many voices in a group conscience provide experience, strength and hope and wisdom as we find our path day by day in Fellowship…

Video For Today:

2009 - 2012

Learning with humility means we share the experience of learning. It's not about being perfect, unless it is true to say that the best way forward is always in the imperfectly perfect moment of now. Nothing stays the same, everything changes for us as individuals and for families, communities and societies. And whether we are in Fellowship or interconnected in the big world, everything is changing and not much of anything is standing still if it is to survive evolution and often revolution…

 

In Fellowship we are all trusted servants, and we all have ideas and preferred outcomes? And this can cause strife and difficulties. What makes Fellowship strong and able to continue to grow and develop is the passion and compassion we develop in our group conscience. And because we do not instruct or demand compliance in any way, we usually find a way forward which works for everyone and not just a few. When a faction tries to rule the majority in a group, and dictate rules, laws and regulations, the outcome is decline and dissolution. Unity service and recovery, no requirement to control, no need for exclusion, simply a desire to stop drinking and to be included offers the best way forward just for a day…

"Trust your gut!" Or in other words trust your feelings and then think about it, whatever "it" may be. In the blink of an eye, we can make our minds up about a lifetime partnership based on nature and nurture delivering us into a new relationship in a split second. That is the power of nature and nurture. Being complicated people, when we try and think it out, our thinking often takes us in another direction and then into the world of prejudice and harmful outcomes…

If we have lost or never had, or never learned what our feelings are, it can be a shock to the system to start to recognise the range of feelings we have as human beings. Often we do not have the words in our vocabulary or understanding to express our feelings clearly to those around us and this takes time to learn. Learning about our feelings, in this emotional and spiritual Fellowship is one of the greatest gifts anyone can receive…

When we drop our guard and show the world who we are, those who can help us will. Those who cannot help us, will fade away… No need to guard the inner me or pretend, at the same time it is a frightening prospect to listen to another person's reality until we actually experience our own reality and get used to learning and sharing our experience strength and hope of life just as it is today…

DonInLondon 2005-2011

Twelve steps helps us find acceptance daily and a new way of life, we still have consequences from our past ~ Gerald Jampolsky "Forgiveness means letting go of the past..." Acceptance from others is subject to their understanding, our past actions as well as current attitudes and behaviour...

Life is difficult enough, we need not make it more difficult! People are the way they are and we need find ~ Jessica Lange "Acceptance and tolerance and forgiveness, those are life-altering lessons..." So we may experience life as it is and not as we may wish!

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AA Daily Reflection: OUR GROUP CONSCIENCE “. . . sometimes the good is the enemy of the best.” ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS COMES OF AGE, p. 101 I think these words apply to every area of A.A.’s Three Legacies: Recovery, Unity and Service! I want them etched in my mind and life as I “trudge the Road of Happy Destiny” (Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 164). These words, often spoken by co-founder Bill W., were appropriately said to him as the result of the group’s conscience. It brought home to Bill W. the essence of our Second Tradition: “Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.”

Just as Bill W. was originally urged to remember, I think that in our group discussions we should never settle for the “good,” but always strive to attain the “best.” These common strivings are yet another example of a loving God, as we understand Him, expressing Himself through the group conscience. Experiences such as these help me to stay on the proper path of recovery. I learn to combine initiative with humility, responsibility with thankfulness, and thus relish the joys of living my twenty-four hour program.

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As Bill Sees It ~ In God's Economy... "In God's economy, nothing is wasted. Through failure, we learn a lesson in humility which is probably needed, painful though it is."

We did not always come closer to wisdom by reason of our virtues; our better understanding is often rooted in the pains of our former follies. Because this has been the essence of our individual experience, it is also the essence of our experience as a fellowship. 1. LETTER, 1942

Into the fabric of recovery from alcoholism are woven the Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions, steps to be open honest and willing to learn, traditions to live unity service and recovery.

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Alcoholics Anonymous, 12 Steps AA, Addiction And Recovery, DonInLondon, Don Oddy,

Just For Today, and every day cherish always...

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AA Official Online Site: Daily Reflections

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/aareflections.cfm

AA Official Online Site: Big Book And Twelve And Twelve

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=359

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 29 2013 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power"

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 29 2013 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" "it is the journey and not the destination…" "Am I still judging the world, and using the twelve steps to judge what other people do?" "Am I still trying to be perfect, or am I accepting that I can make progress today?" "Is there anything I am avoiding today?" "Do I really understand that life is truly all about the quality of my emotional and spiritual journey?" "By this time in my life should I have all the things I thought I wanted?" "Do people think I am a success or failure?" Do I want to be right or do I want to be happy? We can be both, if we accept we are making progress and not perfect today…

Video For Today:

Alcoholics Anonymous DonInLondon "Emotional And Spiritual"

"We can restart our day at any time!" I guess the reason why I was asking all these questions just now is because of all the things that can undo me as fast as a drink. I suppose I could call it unhelpful thinking, a sort of thinking that we start to have when we feel that we might not measure up to the expectations of those people we know. And the worst expectation of all is the one that we carry around in our own heads about ourselves. Expectations are resentments under construction. And worse than expectations in my opinion, right now, are the things we feel we are entitled to, just because we think we are entitled...

 

A vision for you: "the usefulness of any vessel is in its emptiness." When I stopped drinking, I was still full of fear, pride and ego. Fear fed paranoia. Pride and ego fed expectations and entitlements. Driven mad by drink and powerless over it, I did not know what to do even though I had all of the toolkit available to me to start a new life given my past experience and the skills and experiences that would lead back to success. No amount of skill and no amount of experience will overcome burnout in particular careers, which require tenacity and superhuman resilience. No one is superhuman, and nobody can live at extremes. It took me quite a while to realise that burning out, left a huge gap. And the potential to restart life from scratch… And yet the attraction to the old life, the old material life and abundant money could have undone me had I not encountered fellowship and friendship. One day at a time…

 

Being empty: a vessel with nothing in it? Half of a vessel empty in my case, all my thinking and past experiences were about getting somewhere. And by the time I got somewhere I would be okay. So when I stopped trying to think what the right answer might be, I was left with a whole void of time where once I had a diary of events for a good year ahead. It felt wrong to have time on my hands, I was racked with guilt and shame about failure to be the man I thought I ought to be. And with our fellowship, or somehow finding out as I needed empty spaces to make sense of why anyone is alive: "the emotional and spiritual experience…" Take away the man-made expectations and entitlements, the man made requirements and measures of success, suddenly life is quite simple…

 

Ah yes, but no, but yes, but no! The whole world careering along on expectations and entitlements based on judgements and measurement. And how do we actually value the life we have? On the one hand we have the material world, which drives most of what goes on. And we have songs written, books written, films made, TV series, all about? How to love, how to be loved back and find useful endeavours in life. Sometimes our thinking will lead us into all the wrong decisions, because we just don't understand what makes us tick on a daily basis… Our emotional and spiritual living…

 

The basics of emotional and spiritual living? Knowing our feelings in the moment of now, good feelings, bad feelings. Ugly feelings. If we know the mood we are in, we know how it impacts on our thinking and our actions. If we feel desperate, thinking is desperate and actions are desperate. If we feel loving, our thinking is loving and the actions that follow are loving. And yet in my life, I suppressed most of my feelings until I got sober, because I feared that if I told the truth, my girl would leave me, my job would be in jeopardy, my family wouldn't understand me. I would conform, so I would fit in. But I could never keep up the pretence and so drowned my sorrows as well as drowning my possibilities. I needed the emptiness in sobriety to really understand what feelings were, real feelings, even if they were awkward feelings in the moment of now. Fellowship helps me deal with my shortcomings: courage to change, faith in doing the next right thing and building confidence to be a human, being human...

 

In recovery we admit and accept the truth of who we are. And having admitted the truth of who we are, we can work with what we've got left. Usually we have remnants of the old life, still very active: fear, pride and ego. And we are asking ourselves to take a leap forward with courage to change, faith in doing the next right thing and trying to develop confidence that it is okay to start from scratch every single day. And more, that it is okay to restart the day at any time, with courage, faith and confidence. To deal with our defects of character which can be extreme in early recovery, fear, pride and ego can shut us down very quickly. And our shortcomings which can be extreme too, lacking courage, faith and confidence, it does take time to find our way. If we let go fear, pride and ego, as often as we can, the emptiness we have can be filled with courage, faith and confidence to change and be a new human trying to be a human being today…

 

How am I feeling this morning? I've been awake most of the night, pondering and not trying to answer any questions about what I should be doing today. The emptiness can gnaw at the soul. If we start to think about what we should do, we will make endless lists which have no point. Emotional and spiritual: when I ask myself how am I feeling right now? I feel like anything might happen, and its okay to be me, learning a little bit more about being a human, being human today. And what are my measures of success? Emotionally and spiritually? Feelings fitting with now, I am experiencing good feelings right now. Not always the case! Because I am human, being human. Good news, my mother has the all clear after treatment for breast cancer at the age of eighty-two. My best friend left messages, and they were funny and made me laugh. And other messages, happy messages… I have been sleeping quite a lot, and realise how tired I have been. There is peacefulness in the early hours of today and the possibility of serenity in the moment of now. I have room to experience and live emotionally in the moment of now. And without a troubled heart about what I should expect of myself? I expect nothing, so something is possible for the rest of the day…

 

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 29 2012 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" Today's AA daily reflection: "we are trusted servants…" To be of service for me is not being servile, it is to be helpful and aware. And being helpful, in any capacity anywhere at any time is a way of life and living to good conscience, and caring about people I encounter in any given day…

Video For Today:

2009 - 2012

 

Trusting ourselves is very difficult when we start from a place self-harm and self-prejudice. Even today, living to good conscience I am often pulled up in the moment and the memory of something I have done in the past which may have broken a rule. Indeed often I was employed to rewrite rules and break the old rules to improve a situation or an organisation. Those recollections make me shudder at how easy it is to be blown off course in a difficult world…

I cannot change the past, at the same time it is a great source of experience. Life today, to be open and honest, and willing to change. To be trustworthy and behave fairly in my relationships. I feel I did start off life with these principles from an early age. And then the real world bent me out of shape. We can compromise and negotiate, at the same time the principles of open honest and willing, unity service and recovery, keep me on the straight and narrow road of destiny one day at a time…

And today I realise it is simply progress. And I must reiterate progress is the key, because even today I can see when I take time out to look at my behaviour and my attitudes, prejudice can surface when people are either dishonest with themselves or dishonest with others. My silence and turning a blind eye to my personal conduct is as bad for me as ignoring the conduct of others… Sometimes it is right to mind my own business and not criticise others, fortunately because I'm aware I can take responsibility for my attitudes and my behaviour day to day…

 

Trust! A breach of trust can be devastating. Thank God, nature and nurture and the universe that I am an open book these days. My medical records are about to be updated and accessible to all medical sources just in case something were to happen to me and I could not communicate...

Trust in relationships, develops through time. At the same time, trusts will be broken because we are human and sometimes without thinking we hurt other people and then worse we hurt ourselves as a consequence. If we feel the pain caused we can grow and learn from it and that is real progress. Amends and forgiveness starts with understanding our own fallibility and the consequences. Forgiveness comes in our learning, humility and accepting a need to change day by day. Forgive everything everybody does, and forgive ourselves as well, and we do face consequences. Trust and forgiveness are earned in the moment, amends can take a lifetime and can be made every single day…

To love, be loved back and useful! How we love each other and how we form loving relationships… There is no rule book, we don't choose who we love, the nature of how we love is demonstrated by our actions and behaviour. Unconditionally loving others will lead to consequences we might prefer were different. And this is perfectly okay with me. Keeping it simple is the most difficult path for complicated people one day at a time…

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DonInLondon 2005-2011

Unity Service & Recovery, we give support, sharing experience, strength and hope. We look to what we can do to help in fellowship, greet, make tea, organise meetings. We may sponsor newcomers and explain how fellowship works. We suggest we never control, we encourage freedom in sobriety, to thine own self be true..

We are good enough today.. progress not perfect. Unconditional love; we help, we support and we love without condition. A gentle reminder to self is understanding unconditional means loving others when they cannot love themselves or anyone else, including us! Keep loving, expect nothing, accept everything is simply as it may be...

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AA Daily Reflection: TRUSTED SERVANTS March 29 They are servants. Theirs is the sometimes thankless privilege of doing the group’s chores. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 134

In Zorba the Greek, Nikos Kazantzakis describes an encounter between his principle character and an old man busily at work planting a tree. “What is it that you are doing?” Zorba asks. The old man replies: “You can see very well what I am doing, my son, I’m planting a tree.” “But why plant a tree,” Zorba asks, “if you won’t be able to see it bear fruit?” And the old man answers: “I, my son, live as though I were never going to die.” The response brings a faint smile to Zorba’s lips and, as he walks away, he exclaims with a note of irony: “How strange - I live as though I were going to die tomorrow!” As a member of Alcoholics Anonymous, I have found that the Third Legacy is a fertile soil in which to plant the tree of my sobriety. The fruits I harvest are wonderful: peace, security, understanding and twenty-four hours of eternal fulfilment; and with the soundness of mind to listen to the voice of my conscience when, in silence, it gently speaks to me, saying: You must let go in service. There are others who must plant the harvest.

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As Bill Sees It ~ Getting off a "Dry Bender" "Sometimes, we become depressed. I ought to know; I have been a champion dry-bender case myself. While the surface causes were a part of the picture -- trigger-events that precipitated depression -- the underlying causes, I am satisfied, ran much deeper. "Intellectually, I could accept my situation. Emotionally, I could not. "To these problems, there are certainly no pat answers. But part of the answer surely lies in the constant effort to practice all of A.A.'s Twelve Steps." LETTER, 1954

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Alcoholics Anonymous, 12 Steps AA, Addiction And Recovery, DonInLondon, Don Oddy,

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Just For Today, and every day cherish always...

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AA Official Online Site: Daily Reflections

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/aareflections.cfm

AA Official Online Site: Big Book And Twelve And Twelve

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=359

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 28 2013 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power"

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 28 2013 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" "nor ought AA membership ever depend on money or conformity." Our nonconformist fellowship opens the door to anyone anywhere who has a desire to stop drinking. If there had been any issues of money or conformity undoubtedly the fellowship would be a lot different. And I would be dead…

Video For Today:

Alcoholics Anonymous DonInLondon "Noncomformist Diversity"

The longer we are in fellowship, to the old-timer who is learning the wisdom of life, the openness of our fellowship becomes more obvious. To the bleeding Deacon, still stuck in old attitudes and old behaviours around manipulation and control and wanting it their way or no way, the openness of the fellowship makes them awkward, loud, complaining and bitter that things aren't the way they used to be... I was looking online to find fellowship and recovery sites, the number is overwhelming. At the same time, face-to-face, and in meetings, I still feel the power and the wisdom of experience, strength and hope shared. And then it seems, it is shared in many places over and over again. Fellowship is working and so are other means of recovery today… Without fellowship, it is doubtful if all these other means of recovery could even be contemplated let alone available to many more who have never heard of Alcoholics Anonymous…

 

The fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous has provided me with the backbone, and the foundation of my recovery. Without a doubt if it had not been suggested to me, where would I be? With over six hundred meetings in my locality, all different and all focused on a desire to stop drinking and share a message of experience, strength and hope, I have gratitude beyond measure. The literature, the big book of experience strength and hope, twelve steps and twelve traditions, as Bill sees it, daily reflections and lots more besides is utilised within fellowship and outside it. The twelve steps as life principles help me every day, and the twelve traditions, which focus on unity, service and recovery in the main keep meetings healthy today…

 

And social networks, websites of all descriptions about recovery from so many different types of addiction will prevail for a good long time. I hope they do, and sharing a message of experience strength and hope, with one purpose to help others, and require no money or subscription in the main. Some of the principles of fellowship are obvious in the way people share their experience strength and hope, and there is no personal gain. And in my experience over the years, no one is out there trying to say they know better than anybody else about recovery, it still takes many people sharing experience, strength and hope to help one person find recovery one day at a time. No single message is enough. It still takes many people to make the difference, and although social networks are really helpful, informing and sustaining recovery, in my experience, and just anecdotally, face-to-face, and in meetings will always be better if we can get there. Many, however cannot get to a meeting or spend time, face-to-face, and so the principles of fellowship can be extended if we desire to communicate through whatever network to share the best we can. Our message of experience, strength and hope requires action in all respects so we can speak and equally important, we can listen and interact with our fellows…

 

Cold arctic winds are blowing from the east across the UK. And the weather is not good for those who cannot get about so easily, so I am grateful for social networks and ways to connect with fellow members of Alcoholics Anonymous. And of course, I can write a letter, talk on the telephone and invite people around. I still prefer meetings, of course, because I have learned so much from listening, shared what I have heard and can keep on doing this as the weather improves. Recovery is still a haphazard process and it would be unhelpful to promote a fix, wherever we are, we are nonprofessional, and that is the power of the personal message, we share wherever we are, in a meeting, in a home, via a social network, it is still a personal and non-professional message. We are not professional in fellowship, we are simply human, human beings. Sharing our emotional and spiritual experience one day at a time…

 

And anonymity, the sanctuary to find out how to be sober, to share with a sense of security and confidentiality is so important. No matter what, the principle of anonymity is only as good as those who will keep what they hear on a specific basis to themselves. And we are aware that gossip kills! If one alcoholic undermines and disrespects another alcoholic and their anonymity, the breach of trust is often found out through gossip. When others breach our trust as a newcomer, the damage done can be the worst calamity. There are things I have shared which have come back as gossip, and the problem with gossip is whatever I shared to start with, now has become something bigger and usually more horrible than ever was. Chinese whispers… These days, and because of the fellowship I have developed a more open way of life, courage to change, faith in doing the next right thing and the confidence to be me wherever I am, an alcoholic in recovery… I may feel okay and not worried about what people think any more when it comes to my history. And the fact that I am an alcoholic. I do not feel self-prejudice or any humiliation by being an alcoholic. That is not the case for many in recovery and respecting anonymity feels right and sacrosanct today. I don't feel there needs to be a leader in fellowship and certainly no spokes persons speaking behalf of anyone. We can share how it works, and why it works, and we can share our personal journey if we wish to, and always for me, always respectful of the anonymity of my friends and fellows, and being respectful in our nonconformist and anarchic democratic fellowship today…

 

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 28 2012 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" 2012 | Alcoholics Anonymous Today's AA daily reflection: "equality…" Steps and traditions work when we work at them and have a timeless quality about them. Timeless in the sense of them working just for today and they remain fresh and instant in our attitudes and actions… Not tablets of stone to weigh us down, more often wisdom to lift us up…

Video For Today:

2009 - 2012

My personal understanding of the steps and traditions is always being developed to meet the needs of my life today. With every breath, truth love and wisdom grows as my life experience grows. This is my personal evolution and sometimes revolution. The first step in my revolution was to completely stop drinking and have a desire to stop drinking. Breaking the habit of a lifetime is a revolution. And then the evolution began…

 

Equality! I am not bigger or smaller or more or less important than anyone else on this planet. Sometimes because of culture and the way society works some people are elevated or feel elevated. Day-to-day I am a learner, and with inclusion I can share my experience, strength and hope. Sometimes it can be wisdom sometimes complete nonsense and nonsensical to the listener or reader. One man's meat, turns another man into a vegetarian! Living your own experience, develops skills and wisdom to be shared where and when we are included and not excluded…

In the fellowship of AA with a desire to stop drinking, we are included which is the very foundation and opportunity to find unconditional love. The newcomer shares about what it is like to be on the front line, the old-timer about what it is like to be sober more than a day. And then of course there are those obvious to everyone else, "bleeding deacons" who find fault with anyone and everyone not just for today, every bleeding day…

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DonInLondon 2005-2011

"Our membership ought to include all who suffer from alcoholism. Hence we may refuse none who wish to recover. Nor ought A.A. membership ever depend upon money or conformity...After joining A.A., I found the way of life I had been searching for. In A.A. no member is any better than any other member; we’re just alcoholics trying to recover from alcoholism"

Our spiritual moment of now is here, same for everyone, to experience; truth, love and wisdom of everyone we meet. Our spiritual experience is contingent on our attitude and behaviour toward; truth, love and wisdom of others. Letting go, we have room for new living, happy or sad, it is "real spiritual life" today..

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AA Daily Reflection: EQUALITY ~ Our membership ought to include all who suffer from alcoholism. Hence we may refuse none who wish to recover. Nor ought A.A. membership ever depend upon money or conformity. Any two or three alcoholics gathered together for sobriety may call themselves an A.A. group, provided that, as a group, they have no other affiliation. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 565

Prior to A.A., I often felt that I didn’t “fit in” with the people around me. Usually “they” had more/less money than I did, and my points of view didn’t jibe with “theirs.” The amount of prejudice I had experienced in society only proved to me just how phony some self -righteous people were. After joining A.A., I found the way of life I had been searching for. In A.A. no member is any better than any other member; we’re just alcoholics trying to recover from alcoholism.

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As Bill Sees It ~ Gratitude Should Go Forward ~ "Gratitude should go forward, rather than backward. "In other words, if you carry the message to still others, you will be making the best possible repayment for the help given to you." No satisfaction has been deeper and no joy greater than in a Twelfth Step job well done. To watch the eyes of men and women open with wonder as they move from darkness into light, to see their lives quickly fill with new purpose and meaning, and above all to watch them awaken to the presence of a loving God in their lives -- these things are the substance of what we receive as we carry A.A.'s message.

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Alcoholics Anonymous, 12 Steps AA, Addiction And Recovery, DonInLondon, Don Oddy,

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Just For Today, and every day cherish always...

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AA Official Online Site: Daily Reflections

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/aareflections.cfm

AA Official Online Site: Big Book And Twelve And Twelve

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=359

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 27 2013 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power"

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 27 2013 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" "stuck in our ways?" Some ways of life will not work anymore. And as individuals, families, communities and societies, we can see that the old ways needed to change. And to anyone in recovery, the old life, fuelled by alcohol and some personal, family, and society values of prejudice, fear, pride and ego would keep people in ignorance. Contempt prior to investigation: sticking to some traditions and beliefs lead to persistent prejudice, bigotry and for any individual, self-destruction…

Video For Today:

Alcoholics Anonymous DonInLondon "Tolerance And Love"

In recovery, I found it essential to let go some of my old values and beliefs about me and let go self-prejudice and the notion that I was a failure because I was like anybody else self-medicating with alcohol, it led to addiction and self-destruction. Maybe I had to let go quite a few things, society believing the alcoholism is self-inflicted wound. That my father was right, alcohol was a sharpener of the wits, especially before starting a long car journey as a driver, and that drowning your sorrows was the best way forward when I couldn't cope. I continually practice to let go being swamped and drowned in fear, pride and ego. I do prefer asking for help when I need it, courage to change when I need to, developing faith in doing the next right thing and improving my confidence by learning, making mistakes and trying new ways when old ways don't work…

 

A friend made a comment about my higher power the other day, they were very happy that I could not define God. And that for as many people as there are on the planet, each person has their own understanding of God, somewhat similar to many, and yet if we were to be able to ask everyone, there would be substantial differences, and still enough similarities for God to be a higher power. The more I have studied what, who, where God works, it seems God works through people who have tolerance and love, that God is truth, love and wisdom in the moment of now. When there is intolerance and prejudice against anyone anywhere for their beliefs and opinions which undermine tolerance and love for one another, that is not God working through people, that is people with prejudice, bigotry and hatred of their fellow human beings on the planet. In recovery, each person follows their path, free of alcohol, there is a great freedom and a greater power manifested. With tolerance and love, humility and equality I have found progress is more profound and nobody is perfect in their assumptions about living life, and certainly not making assumptions based on old ideas about how other people should live their lives today…

 

If we are looking for a higher power to save us, awaiting a lightning bolt from the sky to show us the way, that we are entitled, and expecting a miracle on an individual basis, we are probably missing the miracle. Finding a fellowship and being part of the fellowship which suggests we get our personal freedom of choice back if we can find out how to be sober one day at a time, that for me is a miracle. Prayer, meditation is very worthy and practical, we ask for guidance, we share the need for guidance, and often by meditation and prayer, we do find answers. I have always found prayer, meditation to be valuable in helping me put my feelings and thinking into perspective. And having got that far, prayer and meditation, then sharing my feelings and thoughts with another human being, or in fellowship, or in the congregation of people with common sense and gumption, the answers seem to multiply as the questions and wisdom is shared with everyone… And then I find my higher power is working through others who can help me find my path today…

 

The Polish astronomer Nicholas Copernicus (1473-1543) never liked the Earth-based view of the universe, yet he never publicly announced his views until he was old. This was due to the Church -- anyone who opposed Church doctrine was branded a heretic, and that would destroy your reputation, put you in prison, or even sentence you to death. Depending upon your belief system back in the day, you could be sentenced to death for being a heretic, and still today, with all the ravages of nature and human intolerance, we can still be sentenced to death by the intolerance and hateful beliefs that some humans have about other humans. And worse, in the past, many people have perished because of their own prejudice about themselves and I was nearly one of them. I needed to learn to ask for help from the right people, in the right place at the right time. And when it came to needing to learn about recovery from addiction, Alcoholics Anonymous proved to be the best place to develop humility, and keep on asking for help, which I received in the main, without any prejudice at all…

 

And, as I mentioned yesterday, a modern thinking believer with a strong religious connection helped me start my day. I have no idea how their strong religious connection works for them, it does work. And I'm grateful for their wisdom and their friendship. Am I about to convert to their understanding of God? Of course I am open, honest and willing to listen, at the same time I am happy where I am and feel love and respect from many people of many different faiths and beliefs. The ultimate freedom is to develop our own understanding of God, or to be an atheist or an agnostic. None of these positions need undermine the other. If we have tolerance and love, seek the truth as we can understand it, and accept it, love one another and keep on learning the wisdom of life. There are powers far greater than me of nature and of providence, I am simply grateful for the wisdom of the many who help me one day at a time…

 

Integrity, open honest and willing, seeking the truth: tolerance and love always for those who share these values. When there is intolerance and hatred, when there are influences which are closed down, and non-negotiable, dishonest and unwilling, who do not seek the truth, most people who are moderate are appalled and shrink away from that evil. In fellowship we recognise our similarities and diversity in the main. And yet there are those who would diminish each other in their judgement of beliefs and opinions and would countenance a death sentence for an individual who cannot be compliant to their personal views. Thank goodness in recovery, the similarities and the diversity of our fellowship diminishes these situations and occurrences most days, and hopefully today…

 

How am I feeling? I feel very fortunate that I have let go self-prejudice. I feel very fortunate to live where I live, and that there are many people around me who have tolerance and love, can live their lives in an open, honest and willing manner, so they can keep on learning the truth of now. Just about every religion is represented in my hometown. Just about every ethnic background is represented and living together in tolerance and love. Just about every political view, belief system, sexual orientation between consenting adults is also tolerated by those with an open honest and willing outlook. Some people simply live differently. And yet, although they live differently, the similarities are profound, they wish to live with truth, love and wisdom developing in the moment of now. My father would have found the world and my hometown very difficult with his beliefs and opinions. If only he… He came out of a different age. And we are living in a new age, and it may be just for today, I just feel better knowing that there is more tolerance and love than ever before. And that my spiritual journey, helps me keep on learning how to be a real human being on a spiritual path, and learning how to be myself. Just for a day…

 

One of our cofounders reminded our fellowship about rules, regulations and laws. There are no rules, regulations and laws, there are suggestions. Why? Judge not, lest ye be judged. and Judge not, that ye be not judged. If you condemn other people, then they will have the right to condemn you… As we find in modern times, the same applies. All this is part of learning to be a human being, and as we learn how to be a human being, we will still develop our own personal choices and how to live. I hope today I do not get in the way of your progress in becoming the human being, you can be. I have no power over you. And with tolerance and love, if we all have tolerance and love, life works far better without prejudice. Today…

 

 

Alcoholics Anonymous | March 27 2012 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" Today's AA daily reflection: "AA's freedoms…" As Bill one of the cofounders wrote, "we trust that we already know what our several freedoms truly are; ... And that there are no mandates laws or commandments in our fellowship." If our Fellowship was anything other than anarchic democracy I doubt I would have stayed and found sobriety…

Video For Today:

2009 - 2012

 

I have always found that truth works when I work at it. I have to let go what I think I know and what I've learned which can be full of prejudice towards myself and towards others. Self-prejudice in the end caught me in a spiral of 24 7 drinking, isolation and a desperately desolate existence. Fellowship provided me with a way to find the truth of my situation daily, how to be loved and love back and useful in whatever way a person finds in recovery…

Contingent on the day I ask for help and let go my old attitudes and behaviour, I keep on making progress to be able to feel life as it is in the moment. Every feeling is valid, and when they are at extremes that is when I need ask for help most, because I cannot keep feeling extremes without creating more anxiety and the likelihood of hiding and pretending I am okay, when I am not. Pretence and falsehoods will only gnaw deep and create fear, when there is no need. I need never be alone again…

Let go, asking for help in a practical way when I don't know the answers, does not mean I will get the answers. I will get a broader perspective, and the solution may take some time. Fear, ego and pride will keep me in everlasting ignorance I have heard it said. And I have found that to be true. Let go is one action and incomplete without asking for help, the second action which illuminates and helps me get guidance from any power greater than me. And there are many to ask and some will help me find the solutions day by day by day…

Every single step in the twelve step program is practical and has impact every day. Indeed we need experience of life for the twelve steps to be relevant and for us to learn how they work. The steps keep me in tune with my life as I live it today and it is not about knowing the answers before the questions become obvious. Life is serendipity and full of change and if I do not hold to expectations or feeling I deserve something, like really works and can be lived to the full…

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DonInLondon 2005-2011

If we could see ourselves as others see us, if we could listen as others hear us, if we could feel the impact we have as others feel our impact. The gentle art of feedback, in fellowship we learn to be open, honest and willing, finding out who we are becoming today..

Fellowship where freedom of choice is paramount in sober living, keeps us honest, and willing to change ~ Nelson Mandela "Let freedom reign. The sun never to set on so glorious a human achievement" -/- Unity Service and Recovery, let go and let good, in truth we trust, good for today…

We learn to let go and let good. A daily practice in living twelve steps as we encounter experiences which need us to be forgiving of ourselves and others. Good conscience develops our awareness. Acceptance is our action to free up our choices and 'Keeping Life Real' ~ Hannah Arendt "Forgiveness is the key to action and freedom"

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AA Daily Reflection: A.A.'s FREEDOMS We trust that we already know what our several freedoms truly are; that no future generation of AA’s will ever feel compelled to limit them. Our AA freedoms create the soil in which genuine love can grow. . . . LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 303

I craved freedom. First, freedom to drink; later, freedom from drink. The A.A. program of recovery rests on a foundation of free choice. There are no mandates, laws or commandments. A.A.’s spiritual program, as outlined in the Twelve Steps, and by which I am offered even greater freedoms, is only suggested. I can take it or leave it. Sponsorship is offered, not forced, and I come and go as I will. It is these and other freedoms that allow me to recapture the dignity that was crushed by the burden of drink, and which is so dearly needed to support an enduring sobriety.

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As Bill Sees It ~ Daily Reprieve We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition.

We of A.A. obey spiritual principles, at first because we must, then because we ought to, and ultimately because we love the kind of life such obedience brings. Great suffering and great love are A.A.'s disciplinarians; we need no others.

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Just For Today, and every day cherish always...

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AA Official Online Site: Daily Reflections

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/aareflections.cfm

AA Official Online Site: Big Book And Twelve And Twelve

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=359