Alcoholics Anonymous Blog & Video | March 7 2004 - 2014 | DonInLondon | Step 3 "Your Higher Power"
DonInLondon March 7, 2014: step three month: "made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him." Somebody said yesterday that it took a lot to be an alcoholic, stubbornness and defiance, tenacity and raw determination. Some of those traits in recovery remain: and they said that their tenacity and raw determination serve them well in recovery and help them towards achieving a Ph.D., a doctorate in their chosen profession.
So there is always good news, some of the traits we have can be ruinous, at the same time some of these traits can lead to personal success. And then it's important to understand what motivates each of us as individuals, we all seek success in so many ways, and the diversity of success is built on a foundation of living life on life's terms. In other words, living in the reality of now, if we know where we are now, we can take the next step, which suits our own personal direction and desire. And this diversity is the richness which makes life possible. From moment to moment we learn through experience, strength and hope, how to live emotionally and spiritually, and find our purpose in life.
Recovery has helped me understand so much of what I missed in my early years of life, I learned to exist and grow by being rebellious as much as compliant. Rebellious in the sense that I would risk almost everything in order to make the right decision, stubborn and defiant in some of the areas of life, where I needed to change, and never realised what the change required. Success built on rebellious, stubborn and defiant ways is extremely exhausting, always putting more in to get the right result rather than others would never consider doing consider based on their own principles and life balance. Being stronger, working harder and always willing to go the extra mile meant I was a workaholic, as much as any old olic from the beginning. Work hard and play hard, play time was built on the work ethic, and alcohol was always a reward in my case.
Letting go the notion that the only way to prove my worth was through work, career and now I realise being the best I could be in one area of life, I do understand life balance far better, and I am astonished it took me so long to apply the same principles that I would suggest to other people. When counselling other people, life balance was all part of the equation, and it was easier to apply to other people than myself. Personal life, in my case it might have looked quite exciting for many a year. And for many a year, it was quite exciting and very wonderful, so many romantic interludes, and for some reason back then I could not see how much career sent me off the rails and made me unavailable to the right girl, at the right time. Seeing the world and yet unable to see myself.
I went to two meetings in the morning, both very good and very enlightening. And when I say enlightening, they were because it was easy to relate to the experience, strength and hope of other people. Over the last few weeks, the experience, strength and hope has been about coping with unimaginable grief and loss. And in the main, most people have not been able to cope with unimaginable pain, grief and loss. Not coping, and sharing about it is critical because where else other than a meeting can anyone anywhere come to terms with life threatening, life changing situations and be able to express their true feelings? There are few places these days, the whole world is overwhelmed with grief as well as hope. And in Fellowship we are very practical, sharing the truth, rather than sharing a brave face to the world. We learn how to grieve, and then we learn how to cope again one day at a time.
After two meetings in one morning, should I expect myself to be in better shape to face the world? Sometimes I can say categorically that I have been nourished, emotionally and spiritually by being in the meeting on hearing the experience, strength and hope of other people. And I feel very illuminated that I am not the only one who can suddenly have a burst of anger at something quite small and unimportant. A friend of mine going to a meeting recently found out there was no tea or coffee to be had, because the venue we were in had another reception going on at the same time. The way they were told off for entering a kitchen area, simply to get a cup of tea, and being refused and told off, made them feel murderous towards the person concerned. I too have had those feelings, not about coffee or tea, but simply somebody being obstructive and objectionable. And hearing that made me feel human again, rather than monstrous over something insignificant. We have feelings and we don't act upon them always!
DonInLondon 2004 - 2013
Alcoholics Anonymous | March 7 2013 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" step three "made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him." We all understand God is in our lives in some way or other, because whether we are believers, agnostics, atheists and somewhere in between all of those things in our lives, those who believe have a direct impact on anyone, anywhere, somehow or other. And when we hand over our well-being to the care of others with experience strength and hope, and wisdom in recovery. I cannot find a better source with a desire to help other human beings find sobriety today…
At sixes and sevens this morning: needing to be up and out early, to meet my sister for breakfast at her hotel. Always good to share time with my big sister who helped me beyond measure through the dark days of alcohol addiction. For me, I am alive because of her help and support today. And now we can relate on an equal footing, I hear her wisdom and I share my wisdom. Always laughter, always we discuss the ups and downs of life, the harshness as well as the tenderness as life goes along. And a hearty breakfast for me. And then on the way back, into the market for some necessities and then seeing an old friend on the way home with news of success and happiness. And the day has hardly started!
When I say I was at sixes and sevens, it is an old term, meaning half of me is stuck in old thinking and the other half of me is really into new thinking. Or should I say half of me is stuck in old feelings which are: fear, putting on a poker face and ego covering up any concerns about what I'm doing. And the new feelings of peacefulness and happiness by being able to: have courage to change, faith in doing the next right thing and confidence growing by connecting with the world in an open honest and willing way. Step six being the old life, step seven being the new life. And so it is that the psychic change is possible on any given day...
So far so good, step seven activity has been good this morning. Courage to change, faith and confidence developing by being connected to new experiences and new possibilities today. The living amend is working, living a new life in a new way. Each and every day there is the possibility to keep trudging the road of happy, good, bad and ugly experiences, and having the humility to keep on learning as I go. I must admit it was difficult to get myself motivated and out of a feeling of exhaustion, and then be elated and happy in the company of my sister and I always feel better for seeing her. Putting effort in, overcoming the dark in order to get to the light, it is a daily endeavour, which is sometimes very difficult...
Watching the news about Bank of England manager, Mr King, making recommendations and suggestions about the future policy of the bank and the UK economy and a particular UK bank owned by the state. I guess is his prerogative today, at the same time he is suggesting something which is probably in the remit of the new head of the Bank of England coming in very shortly. A good way of nobbling and hobbling the new man before he's even arrived. And why would he do this? Because he is an instrument of the state and an ideology which needs to run because of the politics of conservatism and the current government. Why bother getting the best man for the job, if they are going to be nobbled and hobbled before they even arrive? If I was the new man coming, I might think twice and stay put in Canada, rather than find oneself, powerless over all the things you are supposed to have power over one day at a time. Just a casual observation that the threat to recovery of the economy has been nobbled and hobbled by ineptitude and stupidity wedded to ideology in the form of Cameron and Osborne stuck on step six and no clue about step seven…
How am I feeling right now? A bit like a grumpy old man in some ways and a happy sensible chap in my own world and in my own community. I am powerless over the politicians and their crass antics and ignorance, they have closed down narrow outlooks, dishonest dealing with the truth of now and their unwillingness to see the magnitude of their blatant self-interest as they dismantle human beings. And I make this comment because it is true, the only way some people keep their riches and become wealthier is by keeping the majority in poverty and blaming them for it. Rich people cannot exist without the majority of poor people making them richer one day at a time. And of course the bankers… Who feel they are owed a living and a particular form of bonus, they have not been set the right key performance indicators, based on wealth creation and not transactions creation, and not on tax avoidance as they have been, and still remain so appraised one day at a time...
So if it’s that bad, why don't I drink today? Very simple, really: I know where I have powerlessness over people places and things, restoration to sanity is a daily endeavour. Letting go and learning new things, sometimes just how to make ends meet. Responsible for myself and my actions, and checking myself out with other friends in the world today. Willingness to change and see what I can do. Admit and accept when I'm wrong and try settle matters to the good. Reflect daily on the can and cannot do and share a message of experience, strength and hope as best as it can be today…
Alcoholics Anonymous | March 7 2012 | Steps In Action | Step 3 "Your Higher Power" Today's AA daily reflection: "willingness to keep on learning without prejudice." I was always a fast learner and very good at putting things into practice. Especially drinking alcohol! And alcohol eventually stopped me in my tracks. One day at a time, living in the moment offers the best learning experience ever, providing I have an open, honest and willing outlook.
Video For Today:
I went to see my doctor yesterday, for results regarding my type I diabetes and related ailments. As part of the process, I wrote down everything on a one-page summary. I felt I was open honest and willing to share everything. Unfortunately for me, my doctor could only feedback two items of news. And all the other stuff I needed to share could not be discussed. I went from denial, to anger and frustration, depression and then acceptance. It was very difficult and then the gift! Referral to a specialist clinic at my local hospital where they really know how to help me on a day-to-day basis. I learn, I forgive and make progress and it will never be perfect…
Coping with reality, letting go and making the best of the worst situations, it really is difficult. I can do this because I have learned to let go and be flexible. Rather than sit in anger and frustration, which has fear and feelings of being undermined, willing and letting go opens the door to solutions rather than creating bigger and nasty problems for myself and others…
And currently the government is devolving responsibility and power to local medical practices. Recognising that the medical practices are intransigent and unable to manage these responsibilities is quite obvious to me. And the result? Undermining a very fragile national health service, creating chaos and failure at national and local levels. And today on top of all this I have toothache because I am waiting to have a wisdom tooth removed by a specialist practice, who must have a waiting list as long as eternity…
Apart from that, life is okay today, and the serenity prayer," God, grant me the serenity, to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference…"
Once we have placed the key of willingness in the lock and have the door ever so slightly open, we find that we can always open it some more. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 35
Let go, let truth, good conscience and wisdom shared guide us [God] ~ Buddha "Believe nothing, unless we feel it agrees with our own reason and our own common sense."
As we let go prejudice and old thinking, we make room for new outlooks and new living ~ Wayne Dyer "Everything you are against weakens you. Everything you are for empowers you." -/- Empowered in sobriety we open the door to life in reality as life is today...
Sharing experience, strength and hope, offers an insight to sober living ~ Swami Sivananda "Always do good to others. Be selfless. Mentally remove everything and be free." -/- It is not our concern what others do, simply what we do in this world today and always, now!
We can multi task our lives away, skimming the surface and missing the deep... ~ Swami Sivananda "Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success." Busy wears us out, cherish and savour the moment of now where we experience reality...
AA Daily Reflection: THE KEY IS WILLINGNESS ~ MARCH 7, Once we have placed the key of willingness in the lock and have the door ever so slightly open, we find that we can always open it some more. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 35
The willingness to give up my pride and self-will to a Power greater than myself has proved to be the only ingredient absolutely necessary to solve all of my problems today. Even the smallest amount of willingness, if sincere, is sufficient to allow God to enter and take control over my problem, pain, or obsession. My level of comfort is in direct relation to the degree of willingness I possess at any given moment to give up my self-will, and allow God’s will to be manifested in my life. With the key of willingness, my worries and fears are powerfully transformed into serenity.
Step Three Video 12 And 12
AA Big Book Video | Chapter 1 | Bill's Story |
AA Big Book Video | Chapter 2 | There Is A Solution |
AA Big Book Video | Chapter 3 | More About Alcoholism |
AA Big Book Video | Chapter 4 | We Agnostics |
AA Big Book Video | Chapter 5 | How It Works |
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