Alcoholics Anonymous Videos | DonInLondon

January 9 2013 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 1 "Powerless" | Alcoholics Anonymous Looking back at the history of my drinking, and listening in a meeting to another share about all the different ways they tried to stop, I realise just how comprehensive my denial of my problem was back in the day. If I had thought logically about my drinking habits over the years, would I have been able to stop? I can only go by the truth: denial of my emotional and spiritual state, and reliant on my thinking, kept me drinking way past my sell by date…

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Feelings Are Very Real

I am truly in awe when I hear people share about their self-awareness about their drinking. Or am I a bit deluded and selective with my own truth? I don't think so and I don't feel so, in my generation of drinkers, and the generation before me, alcohol was always part of the scene. And it seems these days, it is more so? Not really, what I do see on TV, are reality documentaries showing the harm done over and over. In my day there were no such documentaries, all the TV journalists were probably out on the lash, just like me. And being aware of Alcoholics Anonymous? I had no clue about AA at all, or through those decades of drink. And I still wonder how aware people are of the fellowship of AA, until they need it…

In a meeting last night, I listened intently and enjoyed all the words spoken by the principal sharer, the person who kicks off sharing. And I really felt like sharing back, it was a hand raised sharing meeting with the principal sharer getting to choose. Early on in the meeting, I realised quite rightly, that I was not going to get picked or chosen to share anything. The least I could do, was thank the person for their service and the secretary for their service. I had a good chat before the meeting with one or two people, and quite a good chat after the meeting with someone I've known for quite a few years, but do not know too well. Other issues came to the forefront about sharing experience strength and hope. And the maliciousness that can happen if we are sharing online, in another context, the other person had been suffering from libellous and slanderous comments on the Internet... And they wondered what to do about it, my suggestion was simply to hand it over to those with power in these situations and let it go…

And another question asked of me, "what do you mean by this emotional and spiritual stuff?" Or rather it was a question of how do you get to your feelings and knowing what they are, and why do you have to bother? In my case, the only way I used to have any sort of real feeling seemed to be after I had taken the edge off with a drink, where feelings could come out, whatever they were, and they were usually at extremes and never that moderate. Drink made my feelings powerful in my own head, sadly they were really never expressed that well on a face-to-face basis. That is why I do ask myself three simple questions to kick off my emotional and spiritual day: "how am I feeling? Why? And what can I do?" This is me learning to be assertive, just for today…

Those three basic questions to be assertive about one's own situation: "how am I feeling? Why? And what can I do about it?" Is about me before I start to interact with anybody. Asserting how I am feeling is then part of learning to relate to other people and have empathy. If I can ask myself these three basic questions, it stops me making assumptions about how you are feeling, why you feel the way you do and what to do about it. If I expect you to fall into a pattern with me and agree with my desired outcomes, I am likely to upset you greatly. If I am interacting with anyone, feelings or emotions is the starting point, finding out why and then what can we do together is a negotiation and an understanding. Sometimes it works, and it's all very agreeable, and sometimes it becomes what is known as a buggers muddle, or a catastrophe in the making…

One of the most important things in fellowship is to have regard for the people around us, and recognise vulnerability, fear and a lot of anguish going on. Sometimes the newcomer is more of a terrorist, undermining the serenity and sanity of those around them. And indeed, newcomers can be very frightening if we try to help them on our own. It takes the many to help the newcomer, and to cope with their extreme situation. If it was easy to stop drinking, there would be no need for a fellowship like ours, there would be no need for any sort of suggestions and individuals would just give up drink automatically because it is the right thing to do. Of course we know, humans are illogical, they don't come from Vulcan, they usually come to AA in a state of insanity, and then need time to undergo some restoration, stripped down to basics, and then retuned one day at a time…

It is always progress and not perfect, just like life! Life is full of situations which are good, bad, and ugly or a combination of all at the same time about different things. The human condition is to face difficult situations all day long, but if we accept they are difficult situations all day long, they cease to be a problem as difficult, it just becomes life as it is, and nobody in particular is singling us out for any particular treatment. And we are of course part of the difficulty, our approach to life, our approach to other people. And sometimes expecting too much, feeling entitled to something we are not entitled to and generally falling back and into the traps of ego and looking for powerful solutions which are ours will usually make life, not only difficult, it will make any sort of progress impossible…

January 9 2012 | Daily Reflection|

Today's AA daily reflection, all about "an act of providence" and it can be quite easy to see why any intervention which changes our lives to the good and sticks tight is surely providence. My sister threw me into a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous and this did change my life completely. I didn't like it, but it did the trick in the end…

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2012

Developing courage faith and fortitude is an act of providence. The nature of the act of providence, was acceptance that I could not beat alcoholism and that I needed help to develop an outlook of sober one day at a time. And providence was learning it's not a fight, it is a completely new way of living keeping the good and learning the new…

And as a friend of mine said last night "everything we need really is in the serenity prayer, God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and wisdom to know the difference" that simple and yet so complicated when we start to think about it…

A meeting last night, in the bowels of Flood Street! Crowded, hot and sweaty. A wonderful chair which reminded me I had to change my life completely and give up any idea of the old career. My new career may not be mapped into the far distant future, it's just a simple guide one day at a time, to love, be loved back and useful…

DonInLondon 2005-2011

Freedom ~ Thomas Jefferson "Our greatest happiness does not depend on the condition of life in which chance has placed us, but is always the result of a good conscience, good health, occupation, and freedom in all just pursuits."

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Providence ~ “often capitalized : divine guidance or care”

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Just For Today, and every day cherish always...

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AA Official Online Site: Daily Reflections

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/aareflections.cfm

AA Official Online Site: Big Book And Twelve And Twelve

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=359

January 2013 | Step One Reading Video Link: