Alcoholics Anonymous Blog/Video Oct 11 DonInLondon Step 10 "Reality Check"
October 11, 2013 Step Ten Month: "continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Mobile phones! I have a mobile phone, it is a smart phone, and I rarely have the mobile with me. I like to see the world as it is, not distracted and not looking into another world, although that world of technology, has sustained me in a very positive way for many years now. Many times, the question has been asked, "why don't you answer your phone?"
I do apologise if anyone anywhere rings me up, because it is unlikely I will answer straight away. I leave the mobile at home, and with my cameras always at the ready, I enjoy my world around me, and enjoy photography. I enjoy meeting people I know who live in my area, and I enjoy greatly the presence of new people taking in the London I'm still learning to know. Telephones and smart phones, an aid to living, to be answered if available and ready. Communicating without obligation it is a key. Where would I be without my mobile phone? I will be out and about enjoying the world without interruption.
Everything becomes freedom of choice in recovery, the bliss of step ten, promptly admitting our part in matters means whenever we have dipped back into fear, pride and ego, we can let go of it much faster, the desire to impose our righteousness on others. Letting go the fear, pride and ego means we can transition much more quickly in difficult times, and also in the happiest times. Courage to change, faith in doing the next right thing and developing confidence, is all part of humility, living and learning in the moment of now.
What a quirky thing it is, to desire the best smartphone on the planet, and yet once in my possession, I cannot hardly tolerate carrying the best smartphone in my pocket. Very odd behaviour? Not in recovery. Struggling with nature and nurture, my natural desire can be driven to extremes in the most peculiar ways. Even at my advanced age, I would love the enthusiasm of youth to be tempered with the knowledge of a lifetime when it comes to romance. Courage to change, faith in doing the next right thing, and confidence to be the person I am, rather than a fantasy does take precedence one day at a time. Reality does not suck, the fantasy would let me and you down.
Truth is very practical, if we share the truth of who we are rather than the person we think you want to see or want us to be, we find ourselves in the best of company. The best of company are those who understand the truth of who we are and accept us as humans learning to be human every day. Life is full of comedy and tragedy, yesterday, I could laugh in the face of adversity and then seeing the tragedy of others thousands of miles away, tears flowed. I'm always wary if I swing from raucous laughter into tragic tears. And yet understanding that emotions can go from one extreme to another if the extremes in the moment are real, I am in balance in those moments as comedic and tragic as they are today.
A friend mentioned the beauty of letting go, no need to control, no need to be emphatic with other people in our outlook, simply be accepting of our preferences, and the preferences of other people around us. And letting go some notion that other people have particular expectations of us as individuals. If a person is expecting something from you, better to be direct and ask them what their expectations are, rather than flounder and then flounder in fear and darkness. Knowing the truth sooner rather than later, the truth opens doors and closes other doors. We are able to live a less cluttered existence and emerge strongly in the freedoms we choose.
With our tendency for perfection and to be the best we possibly can be, notwithstanding ambition has its place, even doing the simplest thing to check out our emotions: HALT, hungry angry lonely or tired will keep us on our emotional toes. SHI… Satisfied, happy and included and of course loved for being the learners that we are, is a far better place to be. And without the downs, there would be no ups, without the tragedy, we would not recognise comedy. And for each emotion we recognise and embrace in the moment of now, we learn and keep on learning to be human today.
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