July 13 2012 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 7 Courage To Change Alcoholics Anonymous Today's AA daily reflection: "humility is a gift…" If we can keep on learning, learn from our mistakes and realise even though we might experience rock bottom quite a few times sober, we continue to have the opportunity to live in the moment and deepen our experience of life emotionally and spiritually. What I have come to understand, where feelings fit my experience of now good bad or horrible…
No one is singled out to have a bad reaction to anything. And my bad reaction to alcohol? It fixed my feelings, suppressed them or exaggerated some of them. Indeed alcohol bamboozled me, and gave me a sense that I could pick and choose the feelings which were right for me and the feelings I wanted to hide from everybody else. Not a clever way to live life back then. So without fixing my feelings, I learn what they are and how they impact on my thinking and my actions on a daily basis… Always a daily learning exercise!
Step seven and humility, I sometimes feel the "if only moments," if only it had been okay to be a learner when I was young and it was okay just to keep on learning life without fear and mocking prejudice around me. Unfortunately in some households, when one parent has been bullied severely by life and disabled and lost humility, it can be difficult. It is doubly difficult to then be surrounded by the education system which condoned bullying and elitism. It took a while to break free of all that nonsense and start learning again…
Keep it real! Just do it! Do you feel me? These tantalising phrases or idioms we hear all the time. I love living reality, where my feelings fit what is going on. It is not about having so-called good feelings of joy and happiness, all feelings are good if they fit what is going on for us on a daily basis. The sooner we know reality, the sooner we are in the moment and able to experience everything and think and act as we choose. Truth, love and wisdom will always improve spiritual living in the moment of now…
AA Daily Reflections ~ "Humility is a gift: 13 July ~ As long as we placed self-reliance first, a genuine reliance upon a Higher Power was out of the question. That basic ingredient of all humility, a desire to seek and do God’s will, was missing. [12 & 12]
When I first came to A.A., I wanted to find some of the elusive quality called humility. I didn’t realize I was looking for humility because I thought it would help me get what I wanted, and I would do anything for others if I thought God would somehow reward me for it. I try to remember now that the people I meet in the course of my day are as close to God as I am ever going to get while on this earth. I need to pray for knowledge of God’s will today, and see how my experience with hope and pain can help other people; if I can do that, I don’t need to search for humility, it has found me."
If I don’t know what is right for me, then I don’t know what is right for you. When I hear the experience, strength and hope of living life sober, my choices improve, more freedom and better outcomes in the moment of now…
Humility is a gift... sharing experience, strength and hope of what we know helps us support our fellows and our communities. Listening to experience, strength and hope informs us of what we don't know. Humility to learn what I can do, cannot do and wisdom to live the difference...
Humility just for today... Pride and ego can impede my spiritual progress today, seeing the truth of now. Humility and esteem help me be confident learning more of who I may be today. With each step I take today, open honest and willing more is revealed of how to love, be loved and useful ...
July 13 2007
DonInLondon July 13 2007 - Support And Love ‘Day in the Life’
All this week it’s not about me. And I am relieved to be around to support and be there for my family and my Sister in particular. Her Partner of two decades died last Sunday.
There had been hope up until the last day, and even then we all wish for a miracle, and even when the Doctors tell us there is no hope and there is nothing more they can do, we keep pouring out our love and hoping. And we do our best and wonder what else we are there to do. No matter what we have done, there is never a right or wrong way in these matters. Respecting space and distance, and ensuring we can all put one foot in front of the other as time marches all too quickly and so very slowly. These days are hard.
I keep harking back to love. And the simple truth is it was a love affair of many years. And the love was more and more deep. As an outsider looking in, because we are even if we are family, I could see that where things were was just as it may be for two people living and working out next steps.
There is the funeral next Wednesday, and not a wedding as planned on the Friday following. So these days are tinged with promise as well as sadness for how things are right now.
Relief and Gratitude
I am relieved beyond measure for the support shown and the times shared with friends in fellowship who help me keep just right sized. Available to help, not so much put my foot in the way, or tread on feelings needing no more disturbance than has already happened. Its ok to be me and helpful and to absent myself as asked and accepted.
I have gratitude for my friends who share their experiences and their hopes and their grief so I may share mine. And of course be there in whatever shape or form a person, a bother can be.
Many people knew Christopher in many different situations. And their grief is palpable. And as with sudden illness and then an end not foreseen even until the last day as some treatment might have been a possibility, the calamity is profound. So my sister has found it hard these last few days, grieving herself and then others as well, being in touch. It is overwhelming for anyone.
So I am grateful to help as asked and done as requested. And before, I have said I have no experience of these days with a completely sober head. So the experience is as real can be, and nothing stops pain felt in the moment.
Life on Life’s Terms
This spiritual connection to this present moment. And seeing two people who cared deeply for each other, one nursing and one being nursed. And that love kept him going and trying his level best to survive until that last day. Love was key.
Love was Key
We humans and endeavour, connection and better in company when we are grieving a loss, and still much more private time needed without doubt. As others have become aware this week it has been a shock to them and now they feel the grief too. I need to be level and accepting and doing as requested. Whatever this may be. Sometimes nothing as the understanding is there and that is enough.
Every element we humans can feel, every cherished moment and every second recollected. It’s not easy at all for us humans, we come with no experience and no instructions when we come face to face with life in these hardest moments. And especially endings and torments we never wished for.
Friends and Support - Fellowship
Smiles here, just rang a friend who helped me last night just deal with all things actually. And it was good. We nearly had an arrangement to meet up this evening and just checked they were ok.
Its good we do these things. We never know. So I feel ok, having seen my Sister and my Mother tonight. That they are dealing with these moments as best can be. We see courage beyond measure and care and also the love that has been taken away. The gap is immense. And it’s not just family affected as I mentioned. it’s a lot of people who are just finding out.
I am fortunate I realise for fellowship and kindest support I never knew was there, and probably until now, never knew how to accept or even be able to understand until now.
Serenity and Acceptance
A long haul feels less daunting with family and friends, as asked I keep saying, as I know in the past, there is no right or wrong way to be. We just react and respond as we may.
Acceptance, of what can change and what I cannot change does help me. I cannot fix a thing. Fortitude helps, faith in people has been amplified over the last few days. And I guess more is to come. Shock and that feeling of not being able to believe it, still hangs heavy.
Will come as time permits. Recollections are too near and close. Grief will work as it will and we learn something about living we need never wish for. I wonder in these modern times if there is something lacking which we need educate and inform people about these moments. I realise there is little preparation ever as experiences unfold.
At least we see and understand our humanity and frailty and our vulnerability. We see care and support. And we are part of life as life deals. Not ever easy it seems today.
Step 7 "Step 7 Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings" "The way we have come to look at humility is that it is a virtue, one of the principles that AA teaches us to live. The definition we have adopted pictures us as standing naked before God, without pretence nor reservation. It means hiding nothing, being our real selves, both good and bad. A good synonym for humility is honesty." BB Bunch
July Video Reading Step Seven Into Action Link:
Step 7 "Courage To Change" Reading Video Link:
I do not speak for Alcoholics Anonymous I speak for myself. Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of unique and authentic people who speak for themselves where they will to share experience, strength and hope about recovery on a daily basis. Anonymity affords sanctuary to find how to live sober and be open, honest and willing to learn life day by day. For me "truth," "love" and "wisdom" offer the best spiritual experience by living reality today. Into the fabric of recovery from alcoholism are woven the Twelve Steps and the Traditions: steps to be open, honest and willing to learn, traditions to live unity, service and recovery.
Spiritual principles ~ Forgiveness Acceptance Surrender Faith Open-mindedness Honesty Willingness Moral-inventory Amends Humility Persistence Spiritual-growth Service