Monday, 13 February 2012

February 13 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 13 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "we cannot think our way sober." For me it is the difference between thinking and knowing versus actually doing and living sober. I read the books, thought I knew it all and I don't, and waited. I needed to wait for life experiences which meant I could see my old behaviour and my need to change my behaviour as the steps and traditions could be utilised in real life… It was not long before I could see how each step and tradition helped me with my feelings and actions on a daily basis…

Clearly the school of hard knocks and the University of life provides every experience to test and challenge how we can keep sober and live the steps and traditions in our lives. Never perfect, simply progress today and the joy of understanding what my feelings are, rather than thinking what they ought to be was a revelation almost from day one. My first feeling, not pushed away by alcohol was almost paralysing, it was fear. And with the passing of each anxiety state, the fear kept on diminishing to fit reality.

It seemed like I had put the cart before the horse, my thinking had been a fantasy of what I ought to be able to do. As my feelings and emotions started to settle down, I realised if I knew how I was feeling on a daily basis and in the moment, my thinking would be the right size for the day and that moment. Then my actions were more in keeping with the reality of what is happening and not trying to think of myself bigger or smaller than the problems and solutions on that day…

And now, I realise just as I did not think my way into being an alcoholic, it is not thinking which comes first in keeping sober. Knowing how I feel, will always show me the way. Extremes of emotion which do not fit with reality will always lead to overthinking the situation and the actions being extreme and will not help me cope with reality as it is. I really didn't understand my feelings and emotions because I was only half complete. I now know that I can feel anything dependent on my spiritual condition. And as described by an archbishop and probably many other religious and secular "emotional and intellectual scholars," "spiritual living is the ability to cope with what is going on now."

This does not mean we abandon our thinking completely or ignore what we have learned over the years. We need to put the horse before the cart, know our emotional state and how it impacts on our thinking or we keep on doing the same old things expecting a different result which is Einstein's definition of insanity…

Step 2 Reading Video Link:

"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"

DonInLondon 2005-2011

"Even the most brilliant mind is no defense against the disease of alcoholism. I can’t think my way sober." As Bill Sees it

Two meetings, lunchtime at the "hut" for spiritual experiences and traditions. Wonderful chair, all about reality. We can live reality today without the need to take the edge off. Gifts in recovery, getting to know ourselves and those we love. Sometimes just in time, we realise just how much we care for family and make amends before it is too late.

And then "after nines" at Eaton square, all about later sobriety. The good news in later sobriety is to live the days and not rely on years, that we still get into scrapes, fall into holes, bits may drop off us! Same as everyone who keeps on living. And always newcomers looked after in this meeting in a caring way, and similarities and not differences emphasised all the way...

AA Daily: WE CAN'T THINK OUR WAY SOBER ~ FEBRUARY 13 To the intellectually self-sufficient man or woman, many A.A.’s can say, “Yes, we were like you–far too smart for our own good…. Secretly, we felt we could float above the rest of the folks on our brain power alone.” AS BILL SEES IT, p. 60

Even the most brilliant mind is no defense against the disease of alcoholism. I can’t think my way sober. I try to remember that intelligence is a God-given attribute that I may use, a joy–like having a talent for dancing or drawing or carpentry. It does not make me better than anyone else, and it is not a particularly reliable tool for recovery, for it is a power greater than myself who will restore me to sanity–not a high IQ or a college degree.


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